anderson overflow

Jason & Kathryn

2012-02-01T04:48:00.002-08:00

I am so lucky to be with such a loving, caring, thoughtful man that I also consider my best friend. He has been with me through thick and thin. He was with me when were at our happiest and even when we were separated for a year he was still my best friend through some of my darkest moments. We never stopped loving each other through the five years that we have known each other.

At approximately 7:20pm on January 21st my amazing boyfriend and I were on our way to dinner in downtown Athens. As we were walking we came to the Archs of UGA a spot that we had come to many times; as we would take walks together on North Campus on Sunday afternoons, as we went to root the Dawgs on at football games, and even when we each graduated from the best college in the south...hahaha!!! :) He told me that he wanted to check something out at the Archs but all I could think about was eating at Porterhouse Grill, I was starving…haha! As I stood their checking out the famous Archs he grab may hand and express how much he loved me and wants to spend the rest of his life with me. He got down on one knee and asked me to marry him...as I had tears of joy streaming down my face I said, "YES!!!!" We then took a stroll through North Campus and then he told me that he also had dinner reservations at the restaurant and the exact table that we had our very first date at which was at Depalma's Italian. (And hoping that I wasn't too disappointed that we were no longer going to Porterhouse Grill for dinner...haha!) It was more than I could have ever asked from the man that I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with and best, surprising engagement. :) What a surprise it was!!!! :)

Evan & Kellen

2012-02-01T04:48:00.001-08:00

My relationship with Evan started out from the beginning as a unique one. Our love was grounded in a time of tragedy for me. Evan began pursuing me through text after a class we had together, as I was interested initially I quickly engaged in long late night conversations with him. Two days after we began talking my mama suffered a brain aneurysm and passed away. I was certain that Evan would hit the ground running as I knew it was going to be an extremely emotional and "messy" time for me. However, Evan never hesitated to jump in and get messy with me. He stood beside me through the entire thing and never once allowed me to push him away because my baggage was too much for him. This picture is from the day Evan asked me to marry him. Our proposal was the perfect picture of our relationship as chose to propose to me at my precious mama's graveside. Evan said that he knew that no matter how happy I was on the day we got engaged, I would still miss my mama. So he decided to include her into our engagement, and into our future marriage. Although my mama never met Evan, I never question if she would've loved him or not. His heart for the Lord and his strength to lead me through the darkest moment in my life is exactly the man my mama prayed for all of my life for me.

* If you think Evan and Kellen deserve to win a FREE engagement session, leave a comment below! :)

Jacob & Sarah

2012-02-01T04:48:00.000-08:00

Jacob told me we were going Christmas shopping because we still had several things we need to pick up. So, he came to pick me up dressed nice (too nice for shopping), when I asked him why he was dressed so nice his reply was "Gran (his grandma) is with me and it would have been her 63rd anniversary, so I dressed her nice and wanted to look the same." So, off we went… After a few stops he said he needed to run by First Baptist to get a piece of music. When we went in, he took me to the sanctuary where we were greeted by some family members and friends. He then said since his girlfriend told him he couldn't get married at First Baptist he thought it would be a good place to get engaged. He then got down on one knee and ask me to marry him!

If you think Jacob and Sara deserve to win a FREE engagement session
please leave a comment below! :)

Kyle & Krystal

2012-02-01T04:47:00.000-08:00

My fiance, Kyle and I met during my senior year of high school through mutual friends. Our relationship was very casual at first, Kyle had just moved to North Carolina for college so we talked on the phone and via email during the week and each weekend he would drive home to see me. My favorite picture of us was taken before my senior prom, about six months after we started dating. The fountain we were standing in front of, located in downtown Augusta, Georgia soon became our go to spot any time I wanted pictures of the two of us. Almost five years after we first started dating, we were getting ready to take our annual trip to Wisconsin to spend time with Kyle's family. The night before we were to fly out of town, Kyle decided to "start our vacation off right" by going out to one of our favorite resturants. As we were leaving the resturant to go finish packing, Kyle received a phone call from a friend, saying he was stuck downtown and needed a ride home. Naturally, Kyle agreed to go pick his friend up and we drove downtown to get him. When we got to the area where his friend was supposedly waiting, he parked the car and walked to the same fountain where we took our prom pictures years earlier. When I didn't see Kyle's friend anywhere I began to get irritated because I knew we had a lot to get done before our early morning flight. I immediately told Kyle to call his freind and tell him to hurry up and meet us at the fountain so we could go home. Before I realized what was happening, Kyle told me to stand beside the fountain, then got down on one knee and asked me to spend the rest of my life with him! Of course, I said yes and now almost two years after he popped the question we are getting all the final preparations together before we say "I do" on April 20th 2012!

If you think Kyle & Krystal deserve to win a FREE engagement session

please comment below! :)

Hickey/Conley Wedding - Augusta, Georgia Wedding Photographer

2012-02-01T04:27:00.000-08:00

Mr. & Mrs. Conley

I can not begin to express how incredibly sweet this wedding was. I will leave that to the pictures.

Chris and Rachel, thank you so much for allowing me to capture and take part in your special day. I remember when we met for your initial consult and you both agreed that the vision for your ceremony was that it would be a worship event. I want you to know that you succeded. What an amazing testimony to the Lord your love for one another is. I was so encouraged and thankful to be there. I hope you love your images, and I hope they help you to remember the sweet moments that seemed to sweep right by!

Happy One Month Anniversary!

..it was so hard to narrow this down,

if you would like to see more images from this wedding, please check out

the business page on facebook!

miracle monday, augusta georgia newborn photographer

2012-01-30T05:26:00.000-08:00

My sweet friend Ashleigh Dees asked me to help her with a session this weekend with twins. I was so excited when she told me and immediately began thinking of sweet little newborn twin ideas. Later as we talked Ashleigh mentioned that the twins were 7 weeks old. I was so sad. Generally, newborn sessions need to be done within the first ten days of life to get the best "sleepy baby" results. I had settled in my mind on shots of the babies awake, and to my sweet surprise, there was a miracle in store for us. These two beautiful girlies let us get several shots of them with their big beautiful eyes open, and then, out of the blue one sister fell right asleep as we took pictures of her. We posed her and played around, but still never thought that sister number two would get to sleep too, and even if she did, we never thought we could get them BOTH posed! Well, praise the Lord, both girls slept as sweet as little newborns and we had so much fun posing them and playing with fun props!

Thank you so very much Brooke and Sean for letting me join in on the fun.

All four of your girls are gorgeous!

Happy Miracle Monday everyone! I hope you all have a great week!

legacy: Augusta Georgia family and children photographer

2012-01-26T09:08:00.000-08:00

Ashlyn and I met through our hubbies who are longtime friends. It is amazing to think about how different we all are from when we first met. We were all young and in love and now we are grown with families. I can't believe how time flies. As I edited these images I kept thinking about the Nicole Nordeman song, Legacy. The chorus says, "I want to leave a legacy. How will they remember me?Did I choose to love? Did I point to you enough to make a mark on things? I want to leave an offering. A child of mercy and grace who blessed Your name unapologetically, And leave that kind of legacy."

The women in these images are absolutely gorgeous, but far more than that, they are beautiful on the inside. I have only met Ashlyn's mom a few times, and this was the first time I met her grandma, but the sweetness just oozes from these ladies. I truly enjoyed the time I got to spend with ya'll. Thank you so much for allowing me to capture these sweet moments Ashlyn! I hope you all love them!

Brantley Family- Christina Anderson Augusta, GA family and children photographer

2012-01-23T19:49:00.000-08:00

This sweet family was sooo much fun! I can't say enough how much I love it when kids have their own ideas for sessions. These two were very well mannered and added lots of silly fun to our session. Their new baby brother will be so lucky to have such an awesome family to welcome him home :) Thank you Nicole for letting me capture these sweet moments for your family. You guys are precious and I look forward to seeing you again in the next few months!

..and on a personal note, I told Nicole that I was having a hard time weaning Charleston since I knew she was my last. Jonathan leaned over and told me that I might wanna watch out because that was the same feeling Nicole had with what she thought would be her last baby! :)

Miracle Monday

2012-01-23T09:42:00.000-08:00

This past week or so Charleston has struggled with ear infections. One of the medications she was prescribed for the infections caused her to have a rash, so we switched to another and finally ended up with a series of three painful shots. I was informed that the shot a had a numbing medication in it to ease the pain. I was a little nervous because my hubby is highly allergic to certain numbing medications. When he was given the medication as a child his throat began to swell and he could not breath. Luckily, he was at the hospital and they were able to reverse the effects of the medication. More recently he had surgery for a broken nose and the nurse was about to give him his i.v. when I asked her what exactly she was doing and she responded that she was giving him the numbing medication before starting the i.v. I was shocked and informed her quickly that he was allergic to that medication. She apologized and went ahead with the i.v. without numbing meds. Right after she got the i.v. settled my hubby went stiff, his whole upper body turned yellow and his eyes rolled back in his head. He began to have what looked like a seizure and I freaked out! A few nurses rushed into the room, but none of them were doing a thing! They all just stood there! I told them that I needed to go get a doctor or something because we needed some help! In the long run he was fine, just had a reaction from the fear of needles, and possibility of being injected with something he was highly allergic to, but it was one of the scariest moments I can remember in my life.
Back to Charleston..The doctor suggested that she and I hang out in the office for a good 15 minutes after she received the shot just to make sure that she was fine. She received the shot and then sat in my arms and she nursed for a good 15 minutes (yes I am still nursing my 16 mth old ;)). It was a little scary watching her little chest go up and down, making sure her little lips stayed pinkish red, and praying that the Lord was taking care of her. There are so many times as a parent that I try to control my children's lives. I try to shelter them so much. I want to keep any trace of evil out of their earshot or view. I want them in the best schools, a safe neighborhood, and protected from anything that may hurt them. As I sat in the doctors office I could not help but remember who is actually in control of my children. No matter how hard I try to protect them, no matter how many things I do, the Lord is in control of my babies lives. That is so very hard to surrender to. I know in my head that He has them in His hands, but I so often, still live like their lives are in my hands. Each breath that they have is a miracle, each moment I have with them is an amazing blessing. Today I will surrender my worries, and my striving for control to the truth that Jesus is in control. I am so thankful for the beauty of life. Each phase from conception through pregnancy, birth, and each amazing developmental milestone of their lives has fascinated me. I think of Abraham and Isaaac. Abraham was willing to surrender his child to the Lord even up to sacrifice. I have clung to my children like little jewels that I want to hide away in my own personal treasure chest, but deep in my heart I want them to have a passionate relationship with Jesus. I know that my relationship with Him grows through trials and my goal is to trust the Lord with them, pray for them, guide them, and give them God focused counsel. I want them to have the opportunity to go through struggles with their Mom and Dad close by to help guide them, and I never want to forget the little miracles they are :)

I love this section of scripture from Genesis 22

⁹ Then they came to the place of which God had told him; and Abraham built the altar there and arranged the wood, and bound his son Isaac and laid him on the altar, on top of the wood. ¹⁰ Abraham stretched out his hand and took the knife to slay his son. ¹¹ But the angel of the LORD called to him from heaven and said, “Abraham, Abraham!” And he said, “Here I am.” ¹² He said, “Do not stretch out your hand against the lad, and do nothing to him; for now I know that you ^[b]fear God, since you have not withheld your son, your only son, from Me.” ¹³Then Abraham raised his eyes and looked, and behold, behind him a ram caught in the thicket by his horns; and Abraham went and took the ram and offered him up for a burnt offering in the place of his son. ¹⁴ Abraham called the name of that place ^[c]The LORD Will Provide, as it is said to this day, “In the mount of the LORD it will^[d]be provided.”

Murray Family- Augusta, GA family photographer

2012-01-16T21:04:00.000-08:00

I was thinking about offering a few mini sessions for Martin Luther King Jr day. I was wondering if anyone would want to get out in the cold when Katie called me and asked for a session on that day! Katie, thank you for starting a fun day for me! Your kids were fabulous again, and I am pretty certain that your Avery has a little piece of my heart. She is a photographers dream with all of her sassy poses, Jack was so helpful in getting the others to cooperate, and Grant is just so cute! I really enjoyed meeting "the cousins" and getting to know more of your family. Thank you so very much for allowing me to capture the fun these cousins had together! Oh, and happy early birthday to Sophie, and a special thank you to Connor who had some fabulous posing ideas ;) Thanks you guys!

On a side note, thank you to Mommygrams and More for providing such precious applique shirts. They were super helpful in aiding my ability to remember everyones names!

night and day, the final comparison

2012-01-14T07:10:00.000-08:00

You always hear people say that you love your children he same amount, just in different ways.

That was one of the many mysteries in life that left me so confused. I was so confused by the idea, that I cried like a crazy person the night before I had my sweet baby girl. I was terrified that I would not be able to love two children the same, and that one of them was certain to end up hating me.

Of course, I found out quickly that what everyone said was true. I just didn't realize how totally different my babies would be! I know I am not supposed to compare them, but I cant help myself. So, I will try to write it all here and stop talking about it so often.

He is a perfectionist from head to toe. He takes his time and does things just right. If things are not just right, he starts over and tries again. I really wish he could rub a little of that off on me :)

She lives to make messes. Okay, maybe that is unfair to say since she is not even two yet, but I swear she gets into way more stuff than he EVER did. She has written on the walls and loves to open cabinets just so that she can throw everything on the floor. I didn't even think about putting

locks on my cabinets when he was little.

He is a thinker. From the time he was born his little brow stayed furrowed and he just stared at people when they tried to make him smile. When we enter a crowd he sits back for a little while and takes everything in. She typically runs into a crowd, walmart or any other place she might find someone to chat with. She tries to catch the eye of anyone who walks past her and she draws them in with a big smile or wave... and an occasional "no-no" while she points her little finger at them.

He is a rule follower and people pleaser. He has gone through very clear phases of testing me and learning his boundaries, but with consistent consequences he tends to get right on track and do his best to obey. She seems to get some silly pleasure out of doing things that she knows are "off limits", hitting everyone is one of her favorite past times. He never crawled and didn't walk without holding out hands until he was very well balanced. He almost never fell down. He was content to be right with me wherever I was. She crawled all over the place and began to wobble around as soon as she could get her self up on those little legs. She wobbles and falls quite often.

He takes a while to loosen up and even still sometimes doesn't like me to watch him while he dances or sings. He blushes easily and opens up slow. She commands attention wherever she is and loves to be drooled over. He is reserved with his affections and they come on his terms, mostly only with myself and his dad and occasionally the grandparents. She is happy to kiss random strangers and runs around the house hugging and kissing everyone on the arms legs, feet, whatever she can get to.

Somehow, I love them so differently, but the amount is exactly the same.

The same intense, give my life for you kind of love. I can't explain it for the life of me, but its a love I am so thankful to have, and I know my heart is so full because of both of my beautiful little blessings.

..and because a post never feels complete without pictures, these give a good example of some of their little personalities. These were taken at Children's Museum in Atlanta last week (it is awesome and I highly recommend it).

This was the soccer activity at the children's museum. Carson raised his hand to play first, I was totally impressed with him. Carson completed slowly and perfectly, and he happened to finish far slower than the other kid who rushed through, but the guy in charge let all of the kids run through the finish line together in a "tie".

...and after being crowned he was a little embarrassed by all of the attention so he hid out in this little hole for a few minutes :)

..but I came over and called him "Prince Carson" and he could not hold back the giggles about that!

If you read the post you already know that she was just itching to have a turn up there. She ran and giggled and you could see the sparkle in her eye as the "crowd" cheered for her! I had to fight her to get the broom back for the man ;)

.. and they both lived happily ever after ;)

Lifetime baby plan

2012-01-13T20:12:00.000-08:00

I love my clients, but I have to be honest, I love this little fella more than the rest! Baby C is my nephew and I have been so lucky to help capture his first year in pictures. I look forward to capturing his whole lifetime actually ;) Happy first birthday baby C, Aunt Chris loves you very much! I can't help myself... I have to reminisce. First birthday shots will be at the end, and I will start with his birth ;)

Miracle Monday

2012-01-09T07:18:00.000-08:00

This little fella makes my seventh and final newborn for the year. Each time I do a newborn session, I think that I might catch "the fever". As sweet as each of them have been, I still feel like my little family is complete, praise the Lord!

Banks' family and ours go to the same church and we are in the same lifegroup, so I got to see his Mama regularly as her pregnancy progressed. I am so excited about the precious, handsome, little man he is. I am even more excited about what a little miracle reminder he is. He is a reminder of the Lords ability to knit babies together in a mothers womb (Psalm 139:13), and even more than that, he is a reminder of the Lord's miraculous power to sustain marriages. Amanda and Trey's marriage is a testimony of the Lords healing (mine is too!), and a direct result of that healing is this handsome little boy. Thank you Lord, for giving couples the strength and courage to stay together with their focus on You, when giving up would be such an easy way out and thank you for the blessings that come from obedience to Your word ;) Trey and Amanda, I hope these pictures remind you of the sweetness of your baby boy forever, and I hope that they remind you of the miracle and blessings the Lord has amazed us with! Thank you so much for letting me be part of your lives!

This lucky little guy has two gorgeous big sisters too!

The Mclellans

2011-11-22T08:58:00.000-08:00

You may recognize the sweet little face in these photos from two previous sessions. Trace has become one of my favorite regular clients and I was so excited to meet his big brother and Dad for the first time. Trace was not as thrilled about family pictures as he usually is for our sessions of playing, but by the end of the session Dad had figured out how to get him still and smiling! We ended with several great family shots to choose from! On another note, I can not tell you just how sweet this family is. The MR. and Mrs. have been married for 28 years! ( I need to tag that for a miracle Monday post ;)) Glenda, you have been such an encouragement to me and I have truly enjoyed working with your precious family. I hope you enjoy this sneak peak,especially the one with your big baby ;) Thanks Andy for the few smiles you gave, those dimples are great!

Miracle Monday (double miracles)

2011-11-12T21:12:00.000-08:00

Sometimes the night before a session I can hardly sleep.
I get so excited about what new technique/setting I have learned to use with my camera or some fun session idea that I have had. Two weekends ago I had one of those nights. I had two sessions the following day. The first was a session with a family that had grown through a beautiful story of adoption. If you read this blog post I wrote a while back.. you know how I feel about the miracle of adoption. Needless to say, I was excited about the chance to capture the the beauty of a family that had grown through adoption and the love they have for one another. These boys were so silly together and they are near the same age as my little boy so we had a lot in common! Little J, if you ever wonder about your adoption, my prayer for you is that you will be able to accept that your adoption, and the circumstances around it, were God's plan for your life. You were created in His image, knit together in your mothers womb so that you would be a part of this family. He makes no mistakes. You are a miracle, and such a blessing to your Mommy and Daddy :) Thank you Tiffany and Jay for allowing me to share some time with your sweet family and capture such sweet moments of your boys.

...and this is a double miracle post for two reasons. First of all I felt the need to make up for all of the miracle Mondays that I have missed, secondly, I had two miracle sessions on that day :)

Sooooo, Miracle session number two:
I met Jennifer while I was in college. We had a few classes together and got back in touch through facebook. I was so excited when Jennifer contacted me to do pictures for her family. I had seen her little boy in my newsfeed and thought he was such a cutie pie. I looked through her profile pictures ( yes, I know, that may seem weird and I promise I don't facebook stalk ALL of my clients ;0) in order to get a feel for what type things may be good for her little boy during our session (i.e. holding up his head, sitting up, holding his weight on his legs). When I looked through, I noticed that there were not too many pictures of him looking directly at the camera smiling. I made that my goal for the next day. Mostly I prayed. I prayed for wisdom in working with the family and prayed that the Lord would give me some way to make Evan smile. Jennifer and Phillip told me that Evan generally smiles on his own when he feels like it. We were patient, and not long into our session, Jennifer decided to lay Evan in the grass. He looked around a bit and then looked right at my camera where I was laying on the ground beside him, and smiled some of the biggest, most joyful smiles that I have EVER seen in my life! I can not tell you how deeply I thanked the Lord as I snapped away and then again as I edited the images. Evans smiles were so humbling because I knew that there was nothing I could have done to make him smile. I was so thankful to capture the sweetness of this precious little boy for his Mommy and Daddy, oh, and now that I think of it, this is a THREE miracle blog post because Mr. Evan himself is a miracle :) I think I am almost caught up now :)

One of his many contagious smiles from our session :) Thank you Lord!

Love those big brown eyes!

I'll love you forever

2011-11-07T21:24:00.000-08:00

There is just something special about a Mama's boy.

I can not express my love for my son without rambling on and on.

He has a huge piece of my heart. I could stare at him for hours.

I absolutely adore him. He is silly, smart, a thinker, a perfectionist, cautious, a jokester, caring, thoughtful, considerate and loving. At four years, old he still rubs my arm when he snuggles,

still prefers a sippy cup, still wants to be held every now and then,

still likes to give me hugs and kisses,

still thinks I am the most beautiful woman in the world.

Time is going by quickly and he is changing too fast for my liking.

He is still adjusting to having a little sister, sometimes he takes her toys or knocks her over.

Sometimes he disobeys just to get my attention, sometimes he whines a little too much,

and sometimes he looks at me and talks back with the attitude of a teenager.

Even though I can see that he is growing and getting older I can not help but try and convince myself that he will ALWAYS be my little baby.

If you have never read the book LOVE YOU FOREVER by Robert Munsch, I highly recommend it. This has become "our song" and I still get teary eyed EVERY time we read it.

stay focused

2011-11-05T19:11:00.000-07:00

I am learning to balance my work and my home. I am thankful to have gotten busy over the last month, but cautious about how this will impact my family. I am setting limitations on how much I will work because it is hard to say no when you love your job so much. I have to remember how much more I love my family, and the fact that we sold our house so that I can be home with them. The requests and emails threaten to puff my pride. I am flattered to be wanted. So flattered, that I considered opening another family weekend to work.
I am still so amazed by the Lord when he speaks right to my heart, right when I need it! I opened my Bible this morning to Psalm 97 and got to verse 7, "Let all those be ashamed who serve graven images, Who boast themselves of idols". Needless to say, I was reminded of my priorities and what things are the most important in this season of my life. I am thankful and excited to watch the Lord grow my business as I continue to trust him and keep my focus. Most importantly, I am excited to see the way he continues to grows me as a wife, mother, and servant for Him. It is my prayer that my business will continue to be used for ministry as He uses me to touch the lives of the people He puts in my path! I hope to be diligent in learning more and more about my camera so that He can use me for His glory.

Trace

2011-10-16T05:45:00.000-07:00

I had the privilege of photographing this sweet boy about 6 months ago, and I wondered if he would remember me. I am not sure if her remembered me, but I know he liked me all over again. He spoiled me with lots of hugs and snuggles, and it made my day! Thank you so much Glenda and Trace for sharing some of your memories with me. I think you are both wonderful and I can't wait to see you agin in November :)

YIKES!

2011-10-13T13:31:00.000-07:00

My last post was four months ago! YIKES! I can't believe I neglected my blog for that long.

I have been busy learning to balance photography with home life, but I am back now! I think I have it figured out enough to fit some blog time back in. So look for some recent sessions coming up,

here a few recent favorites :)

mercy and grace

2011-05-29T19:34:00.000-07:00

I learned in Sunday school once that mercy is not receiving some time of punishment that you deserve, while grace is receiving something you don't deserve. I would say I have had my fair share of both lately. I am learning to juggle a business while staying home with my babies. I am thrilled at what the Lord is doing, and the people that he is placing in my life, but am still learning to juggle my "stay at home momness :)" with working part time. I am figuring out that I am going to have to set some "work hours" for myself that occur before 11 p.m. In the midst of figuring all of this out, my mind has gotten a little jumbled sometimes and I have made some errors. For example, I signed up for a photography class a few weeks ago. I had my heart set on the class that was on Sunday and wrote that on my calendar, however when the registration opened up for me the Sunday class was full, so I just signed up for the Saturday class. Apparently, I forgot to write that teensie change down on my calendar. Today I was driving along I-20, all excited, with my camera and gear in the front seat beside me. I was giddy about learning some new things. I had been driving for about an hour when I glanced back over the email I had printed with the info for the class and I realized that the date said May 28th... Huh? I checked my cell phone and today was indeed the 29th. My heart dropped. I called one of my friends and had her look up the info. The class was indeed yesterday. I prayed for a little while and thought, I am gonna just call the instructor and ask if I can at least come and observe the class that was happening today even though I knew it was full of students. I knew that the error was completely out of my failure to check my dates, the instructor had every right to say, "sorry lady, the class is full, we won't refund your money, and you can just go on back home." I was prepared for that, in fact I thought I may just have to go sit in a park and read my manual and try to teach myself a few things! I was, however, met on the other end of the phone with encouragement. The instructor said that I was more than welcome to come along to the class and participate since they had two cancellations anyway! I was so relieved! It made me realize how much power we have over someone when they come to us bearing their faults and failures. I know it may sound nerdy, but I was almost in tears of joy at the sweetness that I had been shown when I deserved to be reprimanded for my lack of attention.
I remember when Adam and I were dating and their was a big storm in Augusta, his mom and dad let me stay at their house and I happened to bring along my pet fish. I sat him on one of my future mother in law's antique tables without thinking and the jar left a huge ring on the table. I freaked out, I searched the internet for remedies... I rubbed that table with mayonnaise, toothpaste, and a few other things that I hope would work. I was about 19 years old but I still felt that fear that you have when you are a child and you know you did something bad... you know you are about to get a spanking! I knew I wasn't getting a spanking, but I knew I deserved some type of punishment. My heart melted when my mother in law reassured me that it was absolutely fine, she was not mad at all. Forgiveness and a soft answer are amazing things.. they can completely change a situation. I love Proverbs 15:1 A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. I think about the forgiveness that I receive and how much it humbles me. So many times I screw up. When I am met with sweetness and forgiveness it melts my heart and I am sorry for my mistakes. When I make a mistake and am met with an attack, I become defensive. It makes me think about the Lord and his forgiveness, I cant completely grasp it. I realize that I am a complete mess without Him. My life has changed since my salvation in so many ways, but to think about all of the ways I have offended and all of the bad choices I have made in my life.. and to sit back and realize the complete forgiveness of ALL of it that He gives me... takes my breath away! I am so thankful for that forgiveness.
1 John 1:9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.

sugar and spice

2011-05-05T18:54:00.000-07:00

I remember just eight short months ago when I was so nervous about welcoming my little princess into the world. I wondered how I could love a little girl like I loved my little boy. The truth is just as people say, I love both of my babies the same amount in such different ways. Carson absolutely adores me. He wants to be wherever I am and is genereally content to play with me and just be near me. Carson is changing as he gets older and wants to do more big boy stuff. He is happy with his daddy putting him to bed now and looks forward to going to the hunting club. He still needs his Mommy dates now and then, but he is turning into a boy and is not so much my baby anymore, it is truly bittersweet. I see a big future ahead with my sweet baby girl though! Sweet Charleston is all grins and smiles and her girly ways just melt my heart in a new way. I am completely suckered by that sweet girly grin and those long eyelashes every time! Just so I don't forget, here are some treasures for my heart to my sweet baby girl.

Charleston Makenzie

You are one spunky little sweet heart! I absolutely adore you, little one and cant imagine how I ever worried that I wouldn't love you enough. I could just smother you with kisses day in and day out. You are such a sweet sweet baby. You smile and laugh at people when they speak to you, and you giggle at me and your bubba all day long. I wont lie, you are a little spoiled and are most content in my arms, but you enjoy rolling around on the floor or playingin the exersaucer too. I am much more confident and calm as a mommy this second time around, and I think you benefit from that. At eight months you still arent crawling around, but you are rolling and scooting all around the floor. I am in no rush for you to be completelly mobile! Often when I lay you down asleep you open your eyes and look at me with a huge grin on your face and then go right back to sleep. You have a habit of taking 15 minute power naps and waking up with that same big grin. At those times I am often annoyed but you are so dang cute and amazingly refressehed that I just pick you up and snuggle you! You absolutely adore your Daddy. You light up when you hear his voice in the afternoons when he gets home, and you love for him to sing to you. You stare at him in amazement when he sings "Your beautiful" by Jame Blount (I think). You can't get enough of your Bubba and he makes you laugh harder than anyone else can. You enjoy watching him and listening to him. Sometime while I fold laundry I sit your bouncy seat in his room and he "reads" you stories, you just sit and listen. I am not sure what you and I will do next year when he goes to school, I imagine we will be quite bored the first few weeks until we figure out how to entertain ourselves in the quietness he will leave behind each morning. I assume you must think it is normal to have someone in your face, talking so close that their face touches yours, a good portion of the day. You have a pretty good tolerance for most things your big brother imposes on you, and you have been bopped on the head with his toys (especially bouncy balls) a few times to date. You have a little temper and clench your fists and straighten your little body when you don't get your way or something is taken from you. Speaking of a temper... I think your hair is gonna be strawberry blonde :) You may hate it (and the freckles) when you are young, but you will grow to appreciate it, I hope. Just remember that your mama thinks its special for you to look like her.. Ill explain it all when you get older. For now, I just can't tell you what a joy you are to me and how much I adore your sweetness, giggles, and precious girly ways... and those yummy rolls all over your chunky little body!I love you and am so thankful for you. Here's to pedicures and jewelry sharing as you grow up!

overflow of gratitude

2011-04-22T00:26:00.000-07:00

I guess I should start this post by referencing the original post that explains the meaning behind my blog/business name. If you would like to read it, you can click here.

I was thinking tonight how humbled I am that several people from my recent many sessions have decided that they loved their pictures so much, they wanted to purchase a disc of their entire gallery. I am soo not saying this to brag. My point is that I am AMAZED at how far the Lord has brought me. By no means do I think I have "arrived" at some fabulous" status, my thought is actually the opposite. I sincerely feel like I am just setting out to love and serve Jesus with opportunities and passions He has given me. I have no formal photography training and don't know all of the right lingo to impress any skilled photographer. I mostly have learned hands on and by reading a little here and there. I don't think that I know it all by any means, I have so much growing and learning to do and there are so many moments that I feel absolutely intimidated by the "photography world" and the fierce competition that seems to permeate it. That is why I am humbled to tears of joy that the Lord is using me and teaching me, and that people actually like the photos that I have taken for them. I am amazed. My focus in my business is to encourage others and help them capture moments that they can treasure in a time where life goes by so fast between the hustle of work and chores, that the fun little smiles and moments to play so often get overlooked. I hope that the Lord will use me to encourage others toward Him, that someone may see the joy in my life that only my Jesus can give, the joy that remains through pain and hard times in my life, because my heart is set on eternity. So, while I was looking up a few scriptures on gratitude today I came across this...

Colossians 2:6-7, Therefore as you have received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk in Him, having been firmly rooted and now being built up in Him and established in your faith, just as you were instructed, and overflowing with gratitude.

Overflowing with gratitude, Ha! I think my business name meaning just grew a little :)

I am so thankful for the opportunities that I have had recently. Thankful to have been so busy, even if I have been up editing all night a few times and thankful for a little extra income for our family. The Lord always provides for our needs :) ( there is in fact a little sparrow who built a nest on my front porch... serving as my friendly reminder ).

My heart is happy and full, and I am overflowing with blessings...and gratitude to my Jesus.

Thank y'all so much for all of the encouragement and support you have and continue to provide, it means more than you will ever know!
..and I know its not Monday, but this totally counts as a Monday miracle...

"DIVA-NESS"

2011-04-02T22:10:00.000-07:00

This Mama serves as a mentor for the older girl in these pictures, I love that. I think it is awesome that she is willing to take time out of her life to invest in another yourng woman. The spunky little girl just happens to be her daughter, aka the reason I titled this post, DIVA. This little girl was so funny. She had her own poses and her own spunk,and all her mama had to do was tell her to smile for her Daddy ( who happens to be off serving our country right now), and she lit right up. By the end of our session the little "diva-ness" had rubbed off on the older girl and she became a DIVA for the camera too! You guys were so fun! Thanks for letting me take your photos. I hope you love your sneak peak, beautiful girls!

Look at those sweet little piggies, complete with Diva shoes!

family

2011-04-02T21:48:00.000-07:00

This sweet family was an easy break from all of the little ones during the day. I didn't have to chase them around or make silly noises to get them to smile.this mom and dad are engaged, making this one big, happy family :) I hope you guys enjoy your sneak peak. By the way, I still think that the oldest daughter looks like Bristol Palin. Anyone agree with me?

daddy better load his shot guns :)

2011-03-31T21:11:00.000-07:00

Some of the sweetest encouragement I have been given has been from some of my bestest friends. I was so excited that one of those bestest friends, Cathy, and her sister brought two of the prettiest little girls ever out to have me take their pictures. I loved getting to spend a litle bit of time with people that I love, while I was working, I was just sad I couldn't spend more time with them! Linda, you better watch out, you have two beauty queens on your hands :)

claps and giggles

2011-03-31T20:33:00.000-07:00

This was such a fun little mini. This little boy is about the same age as my own precious little boy, needless to say, we had alot of common intrests ( Toy Story and such). He was such a trooper and was ready to pose, smile and come up with a few creative ideas on his own while I followed him around with my camera :) His little sister was not really thrilled with my taking her pictures or with sitting still for long, but she managed to be one of the highlights of my day. I have always had a hidden talent, aka the ability to make duck sounds. I have made the sound before in an attempt to catch the attention of little ones , but this sweet girl LOVED it. I mean, she clapped and grinned super big each time I quacked. Talk about feeling appreciated! Thank you guys for letting me photograph your sweet babies!

I love the dancing :)

..and I have to include this last one, just so I remember how much Miss E loved my duck noise. I am pretty sure that her brother was thinking, "okay lady, enough with the quacking."

I just couldn't resist the claps and giggles :)

beautiful boys

2011-03-31T19:38:00.000-07:00

This precious family started out placing a sewing order. When I saw how beautiful these boys were, I was so glad that they became photography customers too :). Little T kept me busy because he did not want to stay still, luckily his mom and dad were great to work with and we had fun being creative with this session! Thank you guys for letting me photograph your beautiful family!

Don't worry, there are several more of little bro to come ;)

all smiles

2011-03-22T20:18:00.000-07:00

This sweet little girl was so easy to photograph. Her mommy came prepared with outfit changes and the little princess was ready to smile on cue. It was helpful that they were my last session of the day, which usually eliminates any need to keep an eye on my watch, and also allowed for the best sunlight!

Sweet Little A

2011-03-22T19:59:00.000-07:00

This sweet little girl was on the move during her session. I spent alot of time chasing her, but my favorite shot of the session is from when she was in her Mommy's arms. Little A also made a friend with a little boy who was also having his pictures madeat the same location. Her new friend wanted to give her his lovey.

She is quite the little charmer :).

Daddy's Boy

2011-03-21T22:19:00.000-07:00

This little cutie pie was a daddy's boy all day. I had fun chasing him around, watching him enjoy the scenery and get into some of the same things my little boy used to love, like playing with rocks.

I also got to get a few sweet shots of Mom and Dad, which was really sweet since people often forget to do that once the little ones arrive :)

Thank you Eli, for letting me photograph your sweet family!

Mini Sessions, Stephens

2011-03-18T20:48:00.000-07:00

These little cuties were so much fun to photograph. I went to high school with their Dad and met their Mom through a mutual friend, small world! I love catching up with people from the past and being reminded of

(2 Cor 5:17 one of the reasons for the butterfly logo:)) the person I was before Christ and more importantly the difference in my life now. Enough about me. This is your sneak peak! It's awesome to see such a sweet little family and a Mom and Dad who are dedicated to keeping their family focused on the Lord. I loved that Haley made a yucky face when we asked her to let her brother kiss he on the cheek. I love seeing a brother and sister that clearly love each other and are "BFF".. their shirts from Pretty Pretty Baby say so, after all. I love that Paul and Haley had a random dance session in the field that made for some priceless photos, and that Katy recommended that Paul throw both of their kiddos int he air... also priceless pictures! I had fun with you guys and I hope you guys enjoy your sneak peak!
Katy, I want you to know that I stayed up late just to do these for you.. since you kept on asking.
I know I am that excited when I get my pictures made too!

It clearly helps you smile bigger if you hold your arms staright down and stand at attention :)

I love these next "Daddy shots". Fabulous idea Katy!

Hope that holds you over for a few more days :)

Mini Session Sneak Peak, Little B

2011-03-18T15:21:00.000-07:00

This sweet baby girl does the cutest little squishy thing with her nose and I could not get enough of it. She did smile for the camera a few times, but she mostly just squished that little nose as she checked everything out. Little B was lucky to have her Mommy and her Grandma with her at the session, and I loved getting to capture sweet images of the three generations together. Thank you guys for letting me capture some of your sweet moments :)

I am quite positive that the photo of this sweet girl with

her Mommy and Grandma is my favorite from their session.

March Mini's sneak peak #2

2011-03-16T23:06:00.000-07:00

This Mama is seriously one of the nicest people I have ever met. Sadly, our mini session was cut a little short due to a little mishap. I was so sad that their session was truly a MINI and was worried that there wouldn't be many good shots for them to choose from. Wrong. When your girls are this cute, you can't help but have some good shots. Jessica, thank you so much for letting me photograph your family and these two beautiful little models.

I can't wait to photograph baby number 3!

march mini's sneak peak #1

2011-03-16T20:16:00.000-07:00

"A mother's joy begins when new life is stirring inside...
when a tiny heartbeat is heard for the very first time,
and a playful kick reminds her that she is never alone."
Author: Unknown

I remember the sweetness of my own pregnancies and could not help being excited as I got to take these pictures. This Mommy and Daddy-to-be were such a pleasure to meet and photograph.
Thank you both for making pregnancy look so wonderful !

As I was looking for a sweet quote I came across the one below. It wasn't exactly what I had in mind, but it made me laugh so I thouhgt I'd share :)

“Being pregnant is an occupational hazard of being a wife.” Queen Victoria

treasures for my heart

2011-03-14T18:41:00.000-07:00

Just another note to say that things are starting to get busy over here. I am excited about the business, and trying to learn how to manage it all without letting everything get crazy. Meanwhile, I want to make sure I keep documenting the preciousness of my babies so I dont ever forget.

Recently, I asked Carson if he like being a big brother.. without hesitation he said yes. A few seconds later he looked at Charleston and said, "Sister, do you like being a little princess?"

Tonight I erased Carson's whiteboard and he came over and drew a big cross on it and said, "mommy, do you know why I drew that big cross on my board?" I of course, asked why and he replied, "so that Jesus will know that I love him." I asked him why he loved Jesus and he said, "because of all the things he does for me and because he died on the cross for me."

We got Charleston's ears pierced the other night and they look so cute! She only cried for maybe thirty seconds and it was more from the shock of the noise than the pain.

Charleston has started doing a few little diva things like... breathing all huffy like when she doesn't like something and fake coughing for attention (as if she doesn't get enough).

The weather outside is so pretty lately! I absoluetely LOVE getting outside and feeling the sunshine on my face. We decided that we needed to get out and play a little so we met one of my bestest friends and her two kiddos at the park. I had to bring my camera along because Lara has two sweet baby girls who are beautiful little models :). Here is a little sneak peak of a few shots I got of her girls!

We enjoyed ourselves today.

This baby girls legs are so sweet, but I think I need to go back and "shazam" the grass off :)!

sewing

2011-03-04T04:35:00.000-08:00

My photography schedule is about to get busy and I have a lot of sewing to get done before then! Here is just a little of whats fresh from the sewing room!

Elmo themed party hat

bib and burp set for twins

...and I didnt make that precious hydrangea hat... I bought it. It was one of my favorite new props and I cant wait to use it...preferably on a baby who is equally adorable..with a smaller head!

denial

2011-03-01T18:32:00.000-08:00

I am clearly in denial.

I was ar Subway with my kiddos last week
as I checked out

the cashier (a teeneager) said yes ma'am to me.

I assured him that he did NOT have to "ma'am" me because I was in fact almost the same age as him.

I looked down at my kids

then out the window at my minivan...

and remembered that I will be 30 this year

and it HIT me that I AM a "ma'am!

Really??

In my head I am still 18 ish!

STILL IN DENIAL

Treasures for my heart

2011-02-21T19:15:00.000-08:00

I finally decided to put myself "out there", I have a booth at the local semi annual consignment sale displaying my embroidered items and photography.I am offering some great specials there and would love for you to stop by if you are in the area. It has been fun looking at all of the other vendor items, making new friends, and visiting with my friends as they shop. I am really praying that I will get some clarification about which of my "business ideas" I should focus on from this point out. On a little side note... when I went to pick up the pictures for my vendor booth, the staff at the photo shop said that they would need to see the copyright for the professional pictures that I was printing. I was flattered to tell them that I was the photographer! I know it may not seem like a huge thing, but it made my day. It is thrilling to feel like I am finally getting the hang of something I love so much! I want to remember not to get too wrapped up in my work though, my focus is still these precious little ones and the hubby that God has given me to care for!

I love the grin below. I think she looks so much like her Daddy!

...and my sweet boy

I think he gets this look from his Grandpa. Somehow sticking the tongue out helps with concentrarion.

It seems like just yesterday that I could barely take his picture because he wanted to hold my hand or have me hold him ALL day long. Now I have to convince him to hold my hand. This little boy has a piece of my heart wrapped right around his little finger. Oh, the love I have for my babies is mind boggling!

These are clearly treasures for my heart :)

facebook fan page

2011-02-08T07:07:00.000-08:00

I am doing a little giveaway on my facebook fan page. click here to join for a chance to win a free monogram :)

Dear Jon Jon

2011-02-01T13:30:00.000-08:00

Dear Jon Jon,
Our relationship has gone on for far too long. I still adore you but am being forced to cut things off. I will always cherish the moments we had together. Love, Christina

Have you ever seen that mom walking through the mall with her four year old (okay maybe even three year old) all dressed up in this froo froo outfit he should NOT have on. I mean, I know some people don't like Jon Jon's at all, that is simply a matter of preference, but the age limit on Jon Jon's should just be common sense. I usually thought that mom was strange for dressing her child up so foolishly when she surely realized that he was far too big for such baby clothes! I thought all of that, until I realized that I was that mom! I now know what happens.... you start dressing this baby up so cutesie... and you are just so in love and so amazed at your little boy that when you look at him, you still se a cute baby boy. I am sad to say that Carson probably wore the Jon Jons a little too long.... and if you asked my husband he would say that the fact that I put them on him at all was a little too much. I am finally coming to terms with the fact that I cant put my big four year old in Jon Jons anymore.I must be honest though, today I was getting things organized to sell at a local consignment sale and came across a few size four jon jons that I bought and didn't put on Carson last year.... I seriously hesitated a minute before putting them in the sale pile... and then I made myself put them down. I think a HUGE part of my not wanting to let them go is the fact that I have to realize that Carson is not a baby anymore. For your viewing pleasure, please don't laugh too hard, here are some of my favorite Jon Jons photos of Carson. I nearly cried when I posted some of these and saw how sweet he was, and if I am completely honest, I cant help but laugh at how silly he looks in some of them too!

I know, the blue bubble one was pretty bad. this last one is from this past summer. He had just turned three, and it made my heart happy to see him in it :) I justified myself due to the hot weather and all!

Miracle Monday-home

2011-01-31T08:43:00.000-08:00

I was looking at one of my favorite pictures yesterday. It was taken when Carson was just barely two. It reminded me of one of the MANY miracles the Lord has worked in my life and I decided that I have personally seen enough miracles to start writing about one every Monday. I consider them all blessings and I think it will be helpful to look back on them when I am having a hard time or feel like the next miracle will never come.

Before Carson was even a twinkle in my eye, Adam and I were both working the 9-5 and ready to get our own home. My parents had recently built on 2.5 acres and there were several nice lots available near them. We took the plunge, bought a lot, and built our dream home.

(us with our new lot.. we were so excited about "our grass, our trees,our dirt")

Before we started building we talked and agreed that we would both need to work in order to build exactly what we wanted. I agreed, and went on along picking out paint colors, light fixtures, and door knobs. The building process was really fun for us. Adam and I have a million things to disagree about, but for the most part we have the same taste in what we want our home to look like. I will never forget the first morning I woke up at our new home, with our new canopy bed... I looked over at Adam and said, "I feel like a princess!" We loved that house. We loved every little thing about it from the door that went from our patio to the awesome screened in back porch. Adam loved his separate garage, and I loved being near my parents. A few months after we moved in we found out we were expecting our first precious baby (miracle within a miracle story :)). I had a hard pregnancy and puked nearly every day. When Carson finally arrived in March we were just crazy about him. After a few weeks I realized that I wanted to be home with this baby. I could not bear the thought of leaving him in a daycare or with anyone else. I cried and cried, I begged my hubby, and I looked over our budget again and again trying to figure out how we could make it work. It wasn't going to happen as long as we had such a big mortgage. two weeks before I was supposed to return to work was our three year anniversary and Adam wanted to take me out to the lake for a picnic. It was so sweet, but I cried because I was so upset about having to go back to work. I distinctly remember my first day back at work. We ended up choosing to get a home sitter to watch Carson along with the other few kids she watched. I cried as I drove to her house, I cried as I handed him to her.. and I bawled as I walked out the door. I think I cried most of the day at work too. Once I would get myself together it would be time to pump, which meant I would sit and think about the baby that I longed to nurse while I hooked myself up to a machine so that someone else could feed him. I was a little bitter, and a little depressed. I coveted my time with him and wanted to spend every free minute just loving him. He felt the pain too, maybe because I was so obsessed. the sitter said that, "she never had kept a child like him who she could not just get to give up". There were several days that I would pick him up and he was in a back room in a playpen with the door closed and a t.v. on while he was screaming. I don't know how long he sat in there, I tried to tell myself that he must have just woken up, but it still broke my heart. I was working over 40 hours a week at DFCS with some on call hours, which meant there were some times I would have to go to work in the middle of the night. I specifically remember one client who lived in a really modest home and didn't have much beyond their needs being met, but she prided herself on the fact that she was home raising her babies. I was able to empathize, because I realized that my big, pretty house sure wasn't making me happy, and I would gladly live in a small trailer, or a hut for that matter if it meant I could be home with my baby.

Finally, Adam began to give a little and told me that the only way I would be able to stay home was if we sold the house. I am convinced that he never thought I would agree, since we lived right across from my parents, but I agreed in a heartbeat. A few days later he surprised me with a for sale sign from Lowe's. I cried and cried and hugged him and thanked him a ton. I knew that this move would be way harder for him than it would be for me because the immediate benefit would be as great to him. I am not so sure that he really thought it would sell because the market was starting to go downhill. I prayed, and I prayed. the house was priced over what the realtor, or anyone else thought we would get. By the grace of God a family came along and paid our full asking price. The couple said they were believers and that when they heard why we wanted to move it confirmed that this was the house for them. We closed on the house within one week of Carson's first birthday and my last day of work was the Friday before. Looking back, I still can't believe it happened. It seemed like no one thought it would work, like it was a silly idea, but God knew, and he made a miracle out of what seemed hopeless!

They guy who bought our house ended up being one of my Dad's good friends, and we ended up in a neighborhood full of other stay at home moms with lots of friends for our kiddos. We hope to build again one day when our babies are in school and I go back to work.

Shazam

2011-01-18T12:57:00.000-08:00

For Christmas my hubby surprised me with a new photo editing program that I have been drooling over for a while. One of my favorite photographers, Haley Lamb, recommended Lightroom to me three years ago. I have been using Lightroom and loving it, but I have seen a few things that I really needed Photoshop elements for. It will take me a while to figure the whole thing out, but my favorite trick for today is getting grass off of little girl clothes! Isn't that amazing.Y'all, this is so much fun!

Sweet baby Chance

2011-01-09T14:00:00.000-08:00

I had the priveledge of photographing my newest newphew. He is the tiniest most presious little thing, and the only male in his generation to carry on the family name. We expect big things from such a little boy :). I had a great time snuggling him and laying him around on all of the props that I haven't been able to use yet. this scale has been sitting in my prop stash and I think Chance made perfect use of it. Thanks Jody and Karina for letting me enjoy him. Love ya!

anderson overflow

2011-01-08T21:13:00.000-08:00

anderson overflow

2011-01-07T05:48:00.000-08:00

Well, I think its been my goal before.... like at the beginning of this blog...but I am really gonna get to business this year. I am about to apply for a business licence and tax i.d. number, fancy up my website, organize my portfolio, and a few other things that will hopefully help my "business" succeed. I am also going to start sewing Jon Jons and dresses like a mad woman to help finish getting together the money for Carson's schooling next year. Say a little prayer for me if you think about it. I hope this is going to be a long fun adventure!

disclaimer

2011-01-07T05:45:00.000-08:00

I just wanted to make a little note about my writing. I love sharing my heart and my photos. I am not an English major by a long shot. My writing is probably full of grammatical errors, typos, and incorrect spelling. If you can get past all of that, I hope you are encouraged by my ramblings in some way.

seconds

2011-01-06T05:20:00.000-08:00

I have still been trying to figure out if my parenting Charleston so differently than I parented Carson has more to do with my being at home with her, or her being my second baby. I think it is a mixture of the two, but I am pretty certain that it is mostly because she is my second. My brother and his wife recently had a new baby and it has reminded me of the rush of feelings I had being a first time Mom. The love I felt (feel) for him was so overwhelming, and right along with that was this HUGE weight. I knew that this little life was my responsibility. I treated him as if he were the most fragile china doll ever made. I remember a friend bringing her two year old to the hospital to see him. The little girl was bouncing around on the couch next to the spot where my MIL was holding Carson and I was about to freak out! Looking back, I am not quite sure what I thought was going to happen to him. I just remember the overwhelming stress in that moment and this deep desire to get that bouncy child away from my fragile, new baby! I remember thinking about how close she was to his little head and how badly he could be hurt if she might bump into him. I remember the little coughing gag noises he used to make to clear his little throat since he was a c section baby. The nurse told us to suction his throat when he did that and that he was fine. I wish you could have been in the room when he made that noise (which he did several times). Each time he seemed to make any noise slightly similar to that little cough my husband and I went into a rush and searched frantically for the suction thing and rushed to the baby like his life depended on it! Looking back... we didn't want to freak out about everything, it was just this feeling, this need that we had. Wow, I don't miss those days. Don't get me wrong, I loved being a Mommy from the moment I even thought I might be pregnant, I loved holding, nursing, and just being with my baby. I just don't miss that firstborn stressed Mama feeling. I wish there were something I could have done to make that feeling ease up, but I don't think I could. It was just there and such a real feeling. I think Charleston is a lot more laid back because her Mommy is more laid back. I am okay with Carson holding her and touching her and squishing her cheeks, and sometimes...when I am just about to tell him to leave her alone, I look at her and she is grinning at him from ear to ear. I am okay with sharing her too, that part I think is from being at home with her all day, I feel like I get enough quality time with her so I don't mind sharing her with other people when they are around. I also have found that she is more content. Maybe thats because she has am ore laid back temperament, or maybe its because her Mommy doesn't rush to her rescuer every time she makes a whimper.Charleston actually puts herself to sleep sometimes, can you believe that! I wonder if Carson would have done that if I would have ever let him be for a minute :)

family motto

2011-01-04T12:16:00.000-08:00

Several bloggers I regularly read have talked about having a family motto. Not only does my family not have one, I had never even thought we needed one! It seemed like a neat idea but I couldnt get anything to come together for what I wanted our motto to be... until two days ago. Carson and I were on the floor working his new Toy Story 3 puzzle. The quote right through the middle of the puzzle is, "No One Gets Left Behind." It hit me then that this would be our family motto. We have so many family members who don't have personal relationships with Jesus Christ. If the rapture were to come tomorrow, they would be "left behind." We have shared the gospel with some, and with others we have not. We say we are passionate about their salvation, but are we? Do we really live like it, do we really pray like it? So, that being said, our family motto is "No One Gets Left Behind". Our goal is to live like Christ and to love him so passionately that our children, our family members, and the world around us want to love Him too. Our goal is to pray without ceasing and not just say we are going to pray, to share the gospel any time we are given the opportunity. I don't me aggressively and obnoxiously, I mean with love and compassion. I want to share Jesus regardless of whether people may think I am weird or may avoid being around me, their eternity is more important. I want our family to have a burden, not only for our loved ones, but for the ones around us who are about to be left be hind; the people we have met and the people we will meet in the upcoming year. I am so excited about the huge things I WILL allow God to do through me this year!

Christmas Princess

2010-12-11T07:33:00.000-08:00

My MIL watched Carson for me last Friday night. I had a huge list of things to do Saturday morning. I realized that Carson is now officially not the kid that keeps me from getting stuff done. carson has gotten pretty doggone good at entertaining himself... this little princess on the other hand, not so much! Which is fine, I am a firm believer in the spoiling of babies, especially now that I see the "almost grown" little boy who is starting to like to play with other kids more than his mommy! I knew that day would come, just didn't know it would come so quickly! Our little princess on the other hand is usually pretty good about sitting around and checking things out. Charleston is generally happy if someone talks or smiles at her every now and then, but some days she just wants to be spoiled. Saturday was one of those days, so I spoiled her and cooed at her and snuggled her all day. These precious pictures are about the ONLY thing I accomplished All DAY, and I am completely okay with that :)

There is only one time in your life that you can fit into your stocking! This one time barely worked for such a chunky little princess!

fiasco-an ambitious project that ends as a ridiculous failure

2010-11-29T12:03:00.000-08:00

I took my kids to my favorite little photo spot in T-Town. I had big hopes of getting a Christmas Card photo out of the day. Not so much! Charleston was asleep when we arrived so I spent some time with Carson and took some decent shots of him. Once the little princess woke up I got a (small) handful of shots of the two kiddos together before Carson had to go potty. The outdoor bathrooms were locked. We walked back up to the house on the property and brought all of our stuff in to use their potty. Carson sat for five minutes and couldn't go... so we packed all of our stuff and went back out to get some fabulous photos. We were outside for about two minutes when the princess let me know she was hungry, so I sat and nursed her while Carson played around. Finally, she finished and I still had hopes for some good pictures... I got them all situated, and Carson suddenly had to go potty again! Needless to say, I gave up for that trip. We will be getting out again, hopefully before it gets too cold, and we WILL eat and potty before we go :)

you be the donkey

2010-11-29T11:21:00.000-08:00

Carson and I were playing with the nativity scene a few days ago. I was one of the wisemen. I had my wiseman jump up and down and shout hallelujah as he got so close to the baby Jesus he had been waiting to see. Carson looked at me like I was crazy and said, "Mom, the wisemen did not act like that... here, why dont you be then donkey." Oh, I hate to see the preteen years :)

sweet baby boy

2010-11-19T21:30:00.000-08:00

Carson Paul, I love you.

I love you so much that I can just about cry when I look at you sometimes. You blow my mind in so many ways. You are so so very smart. I am amazed at your ability to reason through so many things. I love the imagination that you are starting to embrace. I love that I always get to be Jessie when you are buzz, and Olive Oil when you are Popeye. I love that I am still your favorite person in the whole wide world. I love that you still like to rub my arm when you are sleepy or when you are drinking something, I know that is not going to last much longer. I think you are the m ost handsome little boy in the whole wide world. You have the most amazing big brown eyes with those long lashes. Sometimes, you can just look at me with that sweet smile, and I know I would try and buy you the whole world if you wanted it. I love that you aren't consumed by a desire for material things yet. I love that you tell me that the only thing you love more than me is God, and I am begging Him daily that it will stay that way. I hope so desperately that you will fall in love with Jesus, and that you will use your life to serve him. I love this picture below. I love how it makes me grin just to look at it. I love that happy face that you make when you tell a joke, or do something funny, and I LOVE that you still like to wear your shoes mix matched. I never knew I could love someone as much as you love your children, and never knew someone could love me so unconditionally like you do. I love you baby boy!

Photography Price list

2010-11-19T11:00:00.001-08:00

mama's girl

2010-11-18T08:10:00.000-08:00

"A son is a son until he takes a wife, but a daughter is a daughter for all of her life."

My mom used to tell me that quote often, though I can't remember quite why. It stuck with me and really seems to be so true in my sister's relationship with her Mom (that sounds funny I know..my sister with her mom- she is obviously my half sister). My sister and her mom are really close. It was so sweet to be able to get some pictures of them together. I hope yall enjoy your second sneak peak :)

... and while I was finishing up I found a "few" more faves!

... and a few more..

this is what happens when you hire an indecisive photographer

I can't help but share all of the fun

I love the finish below and there are only certain photos that it looks good on. I think these are a few!

Now that is all, or there will be no surprises on your disc! Hope you love them as much as I do!

skinny jeans

2010-11-16T09:28:00.000-08:00

Well, I finally stopped trying to convince myself that I will be right back into my old jeans. I said I wasn't going to buy any new pants, in order to motivate myself to get back in shape... but I gave in after wearing the same pair of maternity pants for nearly two months! I went last week and tried on about 30 pair of jeans before finding two half-off pair that were somewhat flattering. In the meantime Carson gave the thumbs up or down to many of the others that I tried on.. or pulled to my knees and then took back off. I have also come to the conclusion that junior clothes are not for me anymore. Yep, I had still been shopping in the juniors until this point. I kinda wondered when I should move to the grown up clothes.. two babies later, I have my answer.. now! I tried on jeans in the juniors dept at Dillards, thought I would just get a few pairs of levis... grabbed three sizes larger than my pre baby size. Non of them fit... they were so tight and I was a little discouraged until I noticed that the tag said "skinny jeans". Oh, well who wants skinny jeans anyway I said to Carson. My precious, sweet, wonderful child then looked at me and said, "Mommy, are skinny jeans just for skinny people?" Um, of course not Carson, I could clearly fit into those... if I wanted to. Thankfully I dont!

Monohan Family

2010-11-09T06:40:00.000-08:00

When you were a kid did you have that one person in your life who would take you to do fun stuff? You know, like play on the McDonalds playground or make painted sweatshirts? For me that person was my big sister. We didn't really "grrow up" together but she used to come pick me up alot when I was a kid and I totally adored her for it. I thought that she could sing like a superstar ( okay, so I still think that), that she was so cool, fun, and a such a great mom to her kids (so, maybe I still think all of that too). I think I learned alot about what type of parent I wanted to be by watching her when I was little. She also helped to spark my interest in photography. Several times she took me out and took my pictures as I dressed up in whatever silliness I could find. Having said all of that...I am so proud to have had the opprotunity to take pictires of my sister and her family. It almost brings me to tears to see how big Dakota (the oldest boy) is. It seems like just yesterday that I was waiting by his playpen in hopes that he would wake up so that I could play with him! Melissa, you look just as beautiful as you always have! I love you! I hope you enjoy your sneak peak :)

well, that was quite a large sneak peak :)

What did I do this weekend?

2010-11-08T12:16:00.000-08:00

Well, I am glad you asked. I spent a little bit of time with these two love birds, who just happen to be part of my hubby's family. I loved that they had some ideas of their own and I loved that Robbie carried her

pink hairbrush in his back pocket with no shame... ah, true love :)

I hope you guys love your sneak peak, I had so much fun and am looking forward to watching ya'll

grow in marraige through the years.

Thank you for letting me take your pictures.

Congratulations! We love yall!

Charleston Makenzie

2010-11-05T13:00:00.000-07:00

Baby girl, you are the sweetest, most precious little girl in the whole world! I am absolutely amazed at what a sweet baby you are. You are generally happy. I mean almost all of the time. There are days that you want to be held but generally you are fine if I sit you down for a little while. On the days you want to be held I just strap you in the Moby or the Mya and you are as happy as can be. You are starting to coo, smile and giggle and it melts my heart! Seriously, I wondered how amazed I would be since I had already seen your brother do these things, but its like a whole new experience with you, its amazingly precious! I wondered how I would love two babies, but I love you just as much as I love your bubba. I feel like I have known you forever, like you were always a part of me.. you were just supposed to be here.. to be part of our family I know, that sounds weird but it's true. You are so beautiful. Sometimes while you are taking your nap I get carried away with house work, when you wake up and I go in to pick you up it's like seeing you for the first time again. You love to just smile and snuggle close. I am so excited and thankful to be your Mommy. Thank you for making it so easy to transition to having two children. I could not imagine how exhausted I would be if you were not such an angel! I love you bunches and bunches! I love your little grunts and growls, your coos and your giggles, your huge chubby cheeks, and your bright happy eyes, I love everything about you and you are so much more than I ever could have hoped for. I love you princess!

jibitz

2010-11-03T12:29:00.000-07:00

Oh, I think I will always remember the jibitz...Carson has loved crocs since he was a tiny baby...before he could even walk

We had a few crocs that came with jibitz on them ( second hand) and Carson thought they were really cool. The first ones I bought him were at a flea market in Daytona and I will never forget how he kept stopping to make sure that Blue and Bob were perfectly straight facing him. Now that Carson is three he still loves the crocs and the jibitz. With the recent Toy Story craze I thought it would be really cool if I got Carson some Toy Story jibitz. I found a pack of 12 on eBay for three bucks! I was so excited. They were from China so it took nearly three weeks for them to arrive and Carson and I were so excited when they showed up on our door step. Little did I know, I was in for a mess. Carson and I put the jibitz all on his shoes ( he had four pair). He wore them and smiled and the characters on his feet. Oh, but one day my fabulous China made jibitz failed me. Shocking, I know (sarcasm)! While Carson and Adam were out for some boy time the Mr. Potato head fell right off of Carson's croc. Thankfully, Adam found him however that did not help much with the meltdown Carson had with Adam or the meltdown he had when he got home and told me about it. We finally calmed him down and glued Mr. Potato Head back on and we thought our jibit problems were behind us... we weren't so lucky. A few weeks later Carson was with the in laws for the day when one of the jibitz came off in Target and was nowhere to be found. Oh, I am sure there was a big meltdown (although my mil assured me it was not bad). Poor Carson cried as he told me about the missing jibit, and I began to wonder why I bought those dumb jibitz in the first place. A week later we were out to lunch with my parents when that same Mr. Potato Head came off again. We found him, but there was still a meltdown and lots of whining. I glued Mr. Potato Head back on, but from then Carson did not want to wear his crocs. He was so worried that he would loose a jibit that he preferred to quit wearing his favorite shoes! I was so convicted as I thought about how many times I "hoard" my material possessions and miss out on blessings I would have by keeping an eternal perspective. I finally decided to buy Carson a "jibitz bracelet" to get my kid back in his favorite shoes. It seems to have worked, and he loves the bracelet.... but I have to tell you that one day about a week ago he wore the bracelet to my parents house and when we got home and I put him to bed the bracelet was not on his arm! Y'all, I looked for that doggone bracelet everywhere and could NOT find it! I told my hubby that he was in charge of asking Carson where the bracelet was and handling the gigantic meltdown that was sure to follow (while I went for a walk of course). Thankfully Carson did not think about it and I found it when we went back to my parents house. The bracelet is now on his bedroom door..where I hope, for all of our sanity, that it stays!

light up shoes

2010-11-02T12:18:00.000-07:00

I always said that I would never buy a pair of these. I always thought they were really ugly. I am sorry if you are offended by my feelings about these shoes. I never understood why people bought them, until this precious little boy saw them and his face lit up. He has never been with me to purchase his shoes before, so I always just got what I liked.Today he went with me. I gave in and let him try the things on while I looked at my husband and mouthed that he should do something to get our child away from these shoes. My husband laughed and we both knew we would be buying those shoes. Carson put them on, smiled so big that I could see every tooth in his mouth, and said, "Mom, how do I look in these!?" What else could I say? He does look pretty cool in them.

false mommy guilt

2010-10-17T12:45:00.000-07:00

I feel guilty sometimes... about things that haven't even happened. I feel guilty that Charleston wont get as much attention as her big brother did. This morning she woke up with her mommy, daddy, AND her big brother kissing her and cooing over her sweetness and I realized that no only will she have just as much attention... she may have more :)

Forgiveness, Flattery, and Lies

2010-10-15T17:42:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I think I am the only one teaching in this parent- child relationship. Sometimes he reminds me that I have alot to learn from him as well. If you know me, you probably know a little about my marriage. My hubby and I have been through some really hard times. We are learning forgiveness and have forgiven a lot. I recently read a quoted in The Love Dare noting that marriages that survive aren't made of two perfect people, but two people who have learned to forgive over and over again. That, my friends, is a true statement. I have many many problems and so does my hubby. We are both selfish sinners. I seem to run from conflict and he seems to get very angry and things that I think are not a big deal. This used to be a HUGE problem for us. My hubby would get really mad and "have a small tantrum" over something that to me seemed trivial like forgetting something or dropping something. I don't care enough about some of my things apparently and don't anger very easily. In the past Adam would get angry and I would get upset and withdraw. i am not telling you this just so you know all of my marital business. I realize this is not a counseling session. My point is that I have been amazed by our marriage since it has been restored. We have come a long way baby! Praise the Lord! My hubby has only gotten "angry" like this twice in the past year and a half and both times I still looked at him like he was a nut and asked why in the world he was acting that way (not the best way to help him out of the funk.. but for some strange reason I still did it... next time I am gonna try a different response). The two times that he got angry his response was so very different. He fumed (said dang it (literally..so glad my babies don't hear cussing from us..though they will inevitably hear it elsewhere),and turned the car around in what was not the most cautious manner)..  for a few minutes and then quietly calmed himself down. You know what he did within about 10 minutes? I was stunned. He apologized. Flat out said he was sorry to me for acting that way and that he should never act that way to me, no matter what happens or how I respond to him. Pretty amazing, huh? Well he then turned and apologized to Carson too. He explained that it is never okay for him(Adam) to act that way or to treat Mommy that way and that he was so sorry. I was seriously amazed. Carson in all of his sweetness quickly replied that he understood and said, I forgive you Daddy." What did I say? Nothing. As much as I wanted to say I forgive you I didn't really "forgive" him yet so I didn't say anything. I was still angry that he even acted that way in the first place. I couldn't turn my attitude around and focus on the positive fact that he has only gotten angry twice in the last year and a half, focus on the fact that he said he was sorry to me within 10 minutes, not only to me, but to Carson as well. Why couldn't I simply say I forgive you quickly? Why am I so slow to forgive and why in the world do I struggle with grudges and bitterness? I eventually said I forgive you... after Carson said to me, "Mommy, daddy said he is sorry." That is what I have taught Carson after all, when someone says they are sorry you say I forgive you. You then forgive them and move on. Boy do I need to practice what I preach!
     Adam then began to explain to Carson that we all mess up sometimes and that is why Christ had to die for us. Carson matter of factly responds that, "Mommy doesn't ever mess up." For a moment I was a tickled at the "sweetness" of his statement until I realized that it wasn't really sweet at all. I have had to ask Carson for forgiveness a few times. The one that quickly comes to mind was the incident with the diving sticks. I have also had to say I am sorry for loosing my patience a few times when I feel like the whining and crying just wont stop, or when I forget something I meant to bring. I am sure there are other time and many more to come, but each time that sweet boy quickly says, "I forgive you Mommy". I am so thankful that Christ forgives when I ask and doesn't struggle with forgiveness like I do.
    On another note, Carson has recently been "learning" about lying. Perhaps testing the waters with lying would be a more appropriate way to say it. I once read a Dr. Dobson statement that said you should never let your child get away with a lie. Not even a small one, because they will learn that they can get away with it. For some reason that quote stuck with me and I am determined not to let my child(ren) think he can get away with a lie. We have talked about what it means to lie and that lies always cause BIG trouble. It is neat to watch him grow in understanding and it has hurt to have had to spank him when he tries to get away with a lie, but I am convinced that it would be so much worse for him in the long run if I let him get away with it. The other day we were having dinner and he was beating on the table or playing with his food and I asked him to stop. He then said,"mama, look over there." He clearly wanted me to just look away so that he could do what he wanted. What an awesome teaching moment to explain that you have to make good choices whether mama is looking or not!

Sweet Shari

2010-10-11T12:26:00.000-07:00

Sweet Shari let me do her bridal portraits... even though I had to back out of photographing her wedding due to sweet Charleston. Charleston's birthday was the week of the wedding and I am pretty sure I would not have done a good job because of that. I am so thankful to still feel like I got to be a part of their special day. Shari you looked so pretty, I can't wait to see the wedding pictures. I am sure that they are wonderful! Here are a few of my favorites.

weighty issues

2010-10-10T08:33:00.000-07:00

My weight and my ~~jeans~~ genes

I have never really struggled with my weight. I have some close girlfriends who have and I think I have finally learned to empathize. While I have gained to an uncomfortable weight before ( beach project working at McD's) I was usually able to get it back under "control" (there I go with my controlling things again) when I got fed up with it, or when none of my clothes fit. I started to eat healthy, drink only water, and exercise. That is not, however, my lifestyle. I work out until I get in shape (or into my clothes) and then I go back to my normal eating habits... where chocolate is a major food group. Just to specify on my love for sweets, I figure if I have only one sweet a day...that's a good thing. Just because I can fit into my small clothing, or am comfortable with the way that my body then looks does not mean that I am in shape by any means. A few years ago my sister began working out and had got into great shape. My dad, who was at the time 60 and did not appear to be in great shape by any means ( he has a large ~~beer belly~~ frame). We all decided to go for a lovely bike ride on the Greenway. I, who had not exercised in quite sometime, thought I would be able to keep up with these two. Geeze Louise! Being 15 years younger than both of them and several pounds lighter means nothing! I ended up walking my little self and my bike during the end of our "ride". My sister and my dad just zoomed right along. My Dad even passed me several times ( while making a bell noise and yelling at me about what side he was about to pass me on... as we had seen another man do). It was really funny at the time! Okay, so there really is a point to this post. I realize I had a baby 5 weeks ago ( tears that my baby is that old already... I JUST had her!)...anyway, after I had Carson the weight seemed to just fall off quickly. I gained 60 pounds with him.. I kinda lived it up and ate like a cow (sorry about that Carson). this time I only gained 40 pounds, but it must have gone to different places i.e. MY HIPS. I can't pull any of my pants past my thighs. I am waiting for my doctors approval on exorcising, and am on the hunt for a double jogger until then. I know I just wrote a blog post about being thankful for the natural wear that child bearing, birth, and rearing takes on my body, but I feel like I have a little bit of a say so about the wight issue.. because, I do. Perhaps I can lay off of the junk and not eat ~~all~~ much of Carson's Halloween candy :) Through all of this I have been struggling with the way that I feel about myself, the way it feels to have to buy bigger clothes because you can't fit into your own, the yucky feeling every time I try on pants that wont pull up or an unflattering shirt, the way it feels to just settle and put on a t shirt and baggy pants, the insecurity and constant tugging on the clothes that do "fit" to make sure that none of the unflattering parts are hanging out or being clung to, the feeling of failure and the decision to just go ahead and eat more junk since you have already failed, the feeling that you are unattractive. Through this I am realizing how hard it is to be overweight. Sometimes I think that when people are overweight they just need self control, but that is easy for me to say when the reality is that I don't have much self control over my eating any more than the next person. I simply have good genes. I haven't really had to struggle with my weight much and I will choose to think a lot differently now about people who do. Thank you Lord for teaching me through incidents that I don't necessarily choose to have, and continue to change and grow my heart for people who are lost and hurting.

a favorite quote and my favorite babies

2010-09-23T13:57:00.000-07:00

Before you were conceived I wanted you, Before you were born I loved you;

Before you were here an hour, I would give my life for you, This is the miracle of life. -Maureen Hawkins

hormone surge

2010-09-23T13:38:00.000-07:00

The night before I went to the hospital to have Charleston I walked around the house like a crazy person. Seriously. I walked around ~~crying~~ bawling the whole night. I bawled anytime Carson or Adam said anything. I bawled when they didn't say anything. I bawled when I looked in Carson's bedroom and folded his clothes. I bawled when I looked in Charlestons room and finished packing her sweet little hair bows. I bawled when I took my shower and... well, you get the point. I just walked around that way, tears streaming down my face the whole night. I was full of fears. What if I can't love Carson the same once I have two kids. What if I cant work with him on his writing and Bible verses anymore? What if I cant hold him or love him as much? What if he hates me, or what if I die? What if Charleston doesn't like me? What if I can't love her like I love(d) Carson? What if I don't get to hold her as much, or teach her as much? What if I cant keep up her pictures and albums like I did his, what if she hates me? What if I feel them cut me during the c section? What if Carson freaks out while we are at the hospital? What if he needs me and I can't be there for him? What if the baby won't nurse? What if Carson doesn't like her? I went on and on tormenting myself like that. The questioning started subtly when I found out I was pregnant, and built up little by little until I could not hold it in anymore and I just cried and cried. I called my sweet sister and told her I thought I MUST be having "prepartom" depression. She was so sweet and encouraging. She reassured me that I was normal and that everything was going to be OK. I look back and wonder why I couldn't just TRUST the LORD. That really is what it all boils down to. I ultimately have no control over any of the things I was so worried about it. It is as if I sometimes think that aside from worrying I have no purpose in life. So, I am going to try my very best to trust him with everything because I know that worry gets me nowhere. I am going to trust him with my babies and their safety and with my life and what will happen to my family if something were to happen to me. I am going to trust Him with any pain or hard times that may come my way because I know that He is in control. In fact He has it all under control, now if I can just let go of the control I just keep clinging to by worrying!

attachment parenting

2010-09-15T14:00:00.000-07:00

I think I will sharea few posts on some of my parenting practices/views (some attachment parenting and some not) and see what you guys think. I am starting with one that is pretty contraversial, and a practice that I enjoy. I began co sleeping with Carson when he was an infant. I was working fulltime plus some with some oncall ontop of that and missed him terribly. I didnt make a decision to put him in the bed, it just sort of evolved into that. I would put him in the bed and nurse him and when he finished we would both fall asleep. He woke up to nurse at night and stayed right beside me as he drifted back to sleep. I read the breastfeeding book by Dr. Sears and was more confident in my "decision" to nurse and co sleep with him from that point on. ( the hubby took some convincing, but thats a whole nother story for another day). Anyway here I am with an infant again and she is currently in a bassinet by our bed, but I dont doubt that she and I will drift off to sleep after nursing with her in the bed now and then. Here is the link to a letter written by Dr. Sears addressing the issue of SIDS with co sleeping. CLICK HERE TO READ. Short of that issue I can't really understand why co sleeping gets such a bad name, unless people are concerned that they will never get the baby out of their bed. Carson transitioned to his big boy bed pretty well and I haven't known too many kids who were a teenager and still wanted to sleep with their mom and dad. Anyway, more on my attachment parenting thoughts later.... maybe nursing or babywearing next.

miracle body

2010-09-14T16:12:00.000-07:00

If one day I began to feel burdened by the stretch marks on my belly or the skin that doesn't hang in quite the same places that it used to...or the chest that maybe hangs a little lower, the wrinkles or the aches that are in all the wrong places... I want to read this post and be reminded that this body may be worn, but it has been used to nourish and birth two amazing miracles. These feet,legs and hips cramped many times from the weight of carrying a sweet little baby 24/7. This belly stretched large enough to hold and support an 8lb 8 oz child and an 8lb 2 oz child. The stretch marks should be a reminder of the movements I once saw inside my belly as I would sit mesmerized for hours on end at the life inside of my wiggling around. The scar from the two c sections are a reminder of the amazing physician who the Lord blessed me with...he took amazing care of me and our two babies during their stay in my belly and their entrance to the world as well as his noting that those two beautiful children both have large heads , of course to house such brilliant minds. The scar is also a reminder of the miracle of medicine. My body was cut open on a table, a baby pulled out, and I was able to recover and walk around within days. The human body simply blows my mind! The sagging and hanging is a reminder of the awesome opportunity I was blessed with of being able to continue using my body to bond with and nourish two beautiful healthy babies by breast milk alone for six months of life and with food for over a year. (Tenative with Charleston but she is doing fabulous with nursing) The wrinkles on my face are a reminder of the nights of waking up to nurse a crying baby, comfort little fears, or just change wet sheets and to be later thanked with sweet hugs or kisses from a comforted little one. So.... when I look in the mirror and see something that is less than perfect I will remind myself that He who created me has been using this body for a much deeper purpose than external beauty at the worlds standards. i will marvel in the beauty and miracles that my Savior has performed using this vessel of mine and be so thankful for the privilege... sagging and all :)

Family pics

2010-07-15T13:22:00.000-07:00

I had the opprotunity to take pictures for the Lafontaine family during the mini sessions last week. The Mr. and Mrs. have been married for 30 years! What a blessing! Thanks for trusting me with your images :) I hope that you LOVE them!

nesting for the crafty

2010-07-14T14:20:00.000-07:00

I could have also titled this post "nesting for the anti clean freak". I have to admit I have been better at my cleaning lately, but its still not my strong point. Craftiness, however, is an area I think I do okay in. So, while most Moms who have only SEVEN WEEKS left before they deliver are cleaning away to prepare for their new little one, I have been sewing and sewing, and sewing. I have had so much fun making things for Charleston, and I just cut out a HUGE stack of custom bibs that I plan to sell. I have learned (by trial and error) how to make gowns for her too! I can't wait to see her in them!

I can't forget about the cutest big brother EVER!

..and laastly, a super cute blanket, with attachments to hook it over the infant carrier.

Sewing

2010-07-13T06:08:00.000-07:00

My embroidery machine had to go to the doctor yesterday, but I hope to have her back soon. You don't realize how much yo love something until its gone. I know I wont get too much more sewing done before Charleston arrives, but I am gonna try my best. I am curious to see if I will ever sew again when I have two little ones at me feet all day. I am still in the process of pulling over some more sewing images and adding stuff I have been sewing recently. I have another mini photo session to post soon too! To see a little of my old sewing site click here!

mini sessions- Gatlin

2010-07-12T06:01:00.000-07:00

I had some free time and energy this past weekend and did a few mini sessions. I loved getting to take pictures of sweet Gatling who recently turned one. He is such a sweet baby and was so easy to photograph. His Gigi brought him and was a huge help with keeping the smiles coming! Thanks Mrs. Kathy for letting me take his pictures, I hope you love them!

I also had a little fun playing around with Lightroom :)

just hangin with the pals

2010-07-09T15:51:00.000-07:00

... Dopey, his favorite :)

reading with your skeleton

2010-07-08T12:02:00.000-07:00

I must confess that I still lay with Carson at night until he falls asleep. I try to make the most of the time by using it to pray for him, our family, his future wife, and whatever is on my heart that night. Last night I decided to bring my book light and a book I was reading into his room so that I could read a little. The light proved to be such a distraction, although it was really sweet making finger puppets as we giggled way past bedtime. Carson was curious about he light and asked what I was doing. When I told him I was reading he just kept staring at me and said, "Are you reading mama?", "I can't hear you reading ?" It never dawned on me that anytime I am laying with him to read it is always out loud. I explained that I was reading silently, in my head. "Oh", he said,"you are reading with your skeleton?" Yep, I guess it is something like that!

diving sticks

2010-07-08T11:56:00.000-07:00

Just wanted to record these two precious memories of Carson before I forget.
First the diving sticks. Carson was introduced to diving sticks by his cousin Lily on July 4th. I did not think he would be able to get them by any means, but he shocked me and was able to jump in ad get them and well as swim to the bottom holding my hand to push off and get them ( in the shallow). We bought him some that night on the way home since we go to our neighborhood pool almost every day. The next day Carson, Nina, and I headed for the pool with the new diving sticks. Another little girl had some of the same type, but I thought hers were a different color.... still Carson was hesitant to put all of his in and played with only one for a while before finally putting all of his in. A while later, as he was getting his sticks, the little girl decided that she wanted to hold her diving sticks. I assumed that Carson had been playing with all of the diving sticks, hers and his, and made him give her 3 of the eight he was holding. He cried and told me over and over that those were his. I tried to explain that the little girl just had the same kind (since I didn't see any other colored ones around). He still couldn't get himself together so I sent him to timeout. He continued to cry so I figured it was nap time and we headed home. He kept going on and on about how those were his and hers were a different color and I kept reassuring him that she just bought the same ones and there was no different color diving stick in the pool. On and on he went until he finally fell asleep. I couldn't understand why he was having such a hard time "getting it". Finally as he was sleeping I looked in the trash at the package from his diving sticks and sure enough he had 8. No wonder he wasn't "getting it", I was the one who was wrong. After he woke up I walked him back to the pool to swim again. I felt so bad. I know my child will suffer injustices ( its just a part of life), but I didn't think it would be at my fault. So I knelt down and offered my teary ( I blame the pregnancy hormones for my crying) apology and explanation to my sweet boy who said, "I forgive you Mommy" and didn't seem upset about it anymore. How sweet forgiveness is when we realize how wrong we are and how much we need it. What a beautiful thing!

privatecy please!

2010-07-05T07:13:00.000-07:00

Carson is starting to ge the concept of "privatecy". He has asked for "privatecy" to use the resteoom a few times, since my 6 year old nephew stayed with us a few days and demonstrated the need to be alone in the bathroom. Poor Carson still hasn't really applied the concept to me though. Last night I went to the bathroom and he followed right behind me (not shocking at all) and closed the door while telling Adam that his Mommy needed some "privatecy" please. It was sweet I guess. Poor kid has no idea that the real person I may just need bathroom privacy from is him :0 He would be shocked at the thought.

2010-07-03T13:05:00.000-07:00

Thank the Lord for patches!!

Lat week my darling hubby informed one of his co workers about my "side job" of monogramming and sewing and got me a job monogramming an adorable outfit for her little girls pictures on that Friday. this would have been easy, had my machine not eaten the outfit! Yep, my precious embroidery machine made little humps in the fabric at the ends of the monogrammed letters. I tried to redo it several times, I even tried to hand sew over the dang thing, but it was not helping. I finally went to Jeff's on Thursday morning in a desperate attempt for some help. ( side note: I LOVE the staff there they always go above and way beyond!) The ladies there assured me that while they could give me some stuff to help me in working with knit fabrics there wasn't much hope for this outfit, unless I put a patch over it. They also reassured me by letting me know that even their big, fancy machine has "eaten" a thing or two and that there is nothing you can do about it. I left there feeling so much better. I then went down to Posh Tots to see if they had another outfit, which they of course did not (they did happen to have a precious outfit that I thought might work if the customer didn't like the patch idea, and that could be saved for Charleston if the patch worked). I finally called and broke the news to the customer and she said a patch would be fine. She was very low stress about the whole thing ( Praise the Lord for patches and low stress people!). So, I sewed the patch on and made a few "extras" for her because of the error on my behalf. The outfit turned out even cuter than it was with just a monogram ( I should have taken a picture of that, but it was quite depressing). I had sewn a few patches for practice and just to "get back on good terms" with my machine and I used those on a burp cloth and a bib, that I think also turned out super cute.... so, of course, I have to make some for Charleston!

Needless to say, that little outfit stressed me out for a few days, but there was a happy ending!

new fonts and appliques

2010-06-28T12:38:00.000-07:00

My new favorite font!

SEWING AND EMBROIDERY

2010-06-28T07:44:00.000-07:00

For more sewing and embroidery please click here. I need to pull more of my sewing over from my old site, but for now, I hope this works :)

recent sewing

2010-06-22T12:41:00.000-07:00

I have been sewing a little recently. I guess I am excited about a sweet baby girl who will be in my arms in about 12 weeks! Yikes, that is really soon!

I had a diapee and wipee case for Carson that I loved, so Charleston had to have a super cute girlie one!

My new favorite font!

This is the pillow for the chair I am reupholstering in Charlestons room. I plan to post that adventure later :)

I couldnt find placemats that I liked so I bought some fabric and made my own!

The pretty flowers on the table help too! Thanks hubby!

be careful little eyes

2010-06-21T14:06:00.000-07:00

Hubby bought Carson a new movie the other night, Toy Story. We had a fun family night eating Ice Cream and watching the movie together. It was the first time Carson actually watched a whole movie (well besides the time that I took him to see the princess in the frog... but he tried to get me to leave halfway through :). Anyway, the movie was cute, but I was honestly disappointed by the fact that the words "shut up" "stupid" and "idiot" are all in the movie. Okay, maybe I am a little prude, but those are bad words in our house. I was hoping that Carson wouldn't notice the words but later he said the word stupid ( not in context, just the word). I explained that it was a mean and ugly word and that we would not say that word in our house. He didn't really seem to understand but I dropped the conversation. Later as I was putting him to bed he wanted me to sing "be careful little eyes", which let me know that he wanted to talk. Anytime we sing that song lately, I can't get through a verse without several questions. "Why do I need to be careful with my eyes, What does that mean, Why don't I want to see bad things, Why is God watching us in Love".... etc and the same for each verse. I started the song anyway and got comfy. Sure enough the questions started. Thankfully Carson and I got to have a good conversation when we got to our ears. Of course, the word stupid came up and we talked about hurtful words and the "dumb dumb incident" and how much ugly words can hurt people. I think he began to get it... a little. Today he randomly said the word stupid and looked to see what my response was. I gave him a warning and assured that a time out would follow. I am a little annoyed that it seems to be a word of interest just because he is not supposed to say it, but I am sure many conversations about ugly words will come in the future.I am also a little frustrated because while I am well aware that my baby will be exposed to things I don't want him to hear or pick up, I sure didn't think it would be by my bringing Disney movies into the house. We also watched Pinocchio a while back and I was a little shocked that the word jackass is used twice in the move, I know, I know, it is the "proper" name for a donkey and was being used in context, but I was still a little shocked.... I was also a little shocked that the kids are smoking cigars in the movie... the birds smoke cigars in Dumbo too, which is just strange to me. Perhaps I have been spoiled my Veggietales and Hermie the worm? Anyway, I am gonna take the hubby's advice and use these things as ways to have discussions and teaching moments with Carson. I just wonder if I am the only one who thought kids movies wouldn't be the place these discussions would start?

Figaroo has a bed

2010-06-21T13:57:00.000-07:00

My baby boy never ceases to amaze me. I must first admit that this entire dilemma comes from my own making. I loved having him right by me at night time from the start and loved having him in the bed with us.. my hubby, not so much. Finally he is sleeping in his bed alone, but there are still some nights that I fall asleep putting him to bed. Hubby usually wakes me up, but if he falls asleep too, I end up sleeping in there.... boo. I am also bad about laying with him if he happens to wake up at 5ish. My thinking is that I am super tired and just wanna go back to sleep. Carson, however, sometimes wakes up a little more than I would like and really wants me to lay with him. Two nights ago he woke up around three and said over the monitor, "Mommy, I need you."I went in and he wanted to rub my arm ( that is is "lovie" and yes there are times I have wished I could just detach it and leave it with him temporarily), so I let him for a while and tried to explain that just because he opens his eyes and notices that I am not there does not mean that he has to call me, he could just try and go back to sleep (shocking to him). I told him that from now on he should just call me if something is wrong... you know like he needs to potty, doesn't feel good etc., I then went back to my bed. Of course, a few minutes later he says, "Mommy, somethings wrong" I went to his room and he told me that his water and piggy bank were in front of his night light. Okay, problem fixed, night light moved, back to my bed. A few minutes later, "Mommy, somethings wrong." I go back to his room and he tells me he is really really cold. I cover him all up and then hear his tummy growl, so I grabbed us both a donut ( since my tummy happened to be growling too). I could tell that he was wide awake by this point so I sat by him and sang a little and he tried to convince me to just sleep with him in his room. I explained that he is a big boy (again) and even noted that Little Bill sleeps in his own bed and so does Max (from Max and Ruby). Carson was quiet for about 20 minutes and just when I thought he MUST be getting tired and ready to fall asleep he says, "Mommy, Pinocchio's father sleeps with him. I was shocked a little that he had been laying there this whole time trying to think of that! I said, "Well honey, that is because they only had one bed." Carson did not give up there though.... "Mommy, Figaro had his own bed." Well he was right after all and the only think I could think to say was that Figaro's bed was an animal bed and that Pinocchio didn't have a big boy bed like Carson did, because if he did he would have surely slept in it... by himself.

6 years

2010-06-09T13:11:00.000-07:00

I am amazed at the miracle that is my marriage. I had no idea what I was getting into the day I got married. I was clueless about being a wife, although I thought I knew it all. It is ONLY by the grace of God that we have survived and even had moments of thriving in our marriage that seem to come more often as we mature. I am so thankful that we have weathered the storms together and have the privilege of serving and loving one another as we grow old together. I am thankful for a husband who: loves Jesus more than anything in the world, who loves me even when I am hard to love, who fought for our marriage when I was ready to give up, who works his butt off to provide for his family, who supports my being home to raise our babies even though it was a hard choice, who encourages me in my areas of strength, who makes a point to spend time with his family, who tries really hard to be a good Daddy, who can make me laugh when all I want to do is cry, who knows me better than I know myself sometimes, who shares the gospel with boldness, who's heart is to lead our family, who weeps for our lost family and friends, who is my partner in life, my team mate, my best friend, and also just happens to be such a hottie that I still cant stop myself from pinching his butt all of the time... drives him crazy! I love you Adam and I am so thankful for our marriage!

2010-05-20T12:44:00.000-07:00

Somebody got new cowboy boots yesterday

and he had to put them on before we left the store

even though he didn't have on any socks.

He thinks they make him look like Woody ( from the toy Story).

He also thinks that I should pretend I am Buzz Lightyear.

He wore them again today when we went to my OBGYN appointment.

It made us both very happy!

just a little blog link

2010-05-20T12:23:00.000-07:00

I wanted to share this letter for several reasons. 1. I wasn't raised in a Christian home, and wish I had someone to tell me these things 2. In case someone reads my blog and can be encouraged by something in this letter... and finally, so that I can remember where it is and come back to it as I need to!

Delighted

2010-05-19T06:22:00.000-07:00

There are several blogs that I follow. I was reading one this morning though and just HAVE to share it with you. I am always thinking about how much I love Carson and have recently decided that I might just be okay with having only two children ( especially since we will have a boy and a girl), because I want them both to know they are the delight of mine and their Daddy's heart. It is such a blessing to have Carson around family and friends where he is totally loved, and admired. I always think it is a little strange when you put your child in a big room of kids, or at another kids party where your kid is not the center of everything. It is a good reality check for me. Mostly, it is a reminder that I need to prepare him that unlike at home, the world will not stop for him and out there... he is just another kid. I really, really, want to be supportive of my kids,to be at their activities and support them in whatever they do. Ive been thinking about that recently and I happened to read this blog and it made my heart melt. She basically talks about the Lord delighting in us the way we delight in our children! I never put the two together! What an amazing thought and reminder of His love for us/me. Today, in light of that, I am amazed at His love for me!!!! Because I know how much I love Carson, it totally blows my mind to think the Lord loves me that way..... but even more, he loved me so much more.... enough to sacrifice His Son. I wouldn't even be willing for Carson to get an injury for someone elses benefit, let alone die! (on a side note, I also super love the Kathryn Scott song that plays on her blogsite!)

Treasures for my heart

2010-05-15T15:22:00.000-07:00

Carson has had a few rough days in the past week. He goes through those every now and then. He generally listens pretty well without much time out or popping, however about every month or two he has about two or three hard days of testing me. I think he just has to be reminded that my consequences are not merely threats, and usually after a day or so he gets himself back together and remembers how to listen. Anyway, the other day I happened to glance at the time out stool and think, "Hey I haven't had to use that in a good while." I smiled to myself because I am so proud that he generally listens well. Hmmm, I should have been thinking about that lovely little verse in Proverbs 16:8. You know, "Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall." Well, fall we did and Carson tested, pushed and didn't listen for the next three days (at least). I would say, "don't throw another thing, or there will be a consequence." He would then throw said thing anyway, and get to sit in time out. He would get out of timeout and throw something again, he would then get a pop and timeout. The worst was when he kicked his daddy and got a spanking. ( The most defiant thing he has ever done, in my opinion, was when he threw a cup of his bath water on me, "because I wouldn't listen to him." Yep, that was a spanking... and has never happened again) The testing days are so hard and I am so thankful for encouragement during those days that feel like they will never end. Being consistent is so hard, because there are most definitely times that I would find it easier to turn the other way when Carson throws something or jumps on the couch, but I know its not fair to him if he can't expect the same response form me each time. I think I received one of the best compliments ever the other day at the park from a new friend, Jessica, who said that she loved the first time she met me and watched me put Carson in time out and make him stay there until timeout was over. Jessica stated that she knew that I was the kind of parent she wanted to be friends with ( I can't remember what she said word for word, but this is what I heard :), I assure you that as a parent, that is one of the biggest compliments. I have seen a lot of Mommys around who don't discipline their kids, and I assure you that I don't want to regularly expose my child to that type of behavior. i never realized how picky I would be about my child's friends/playmates, but when I put in alot of hard work disciplining him, I would love for him to see other children whose parents do the same and receive respect from their children. Sadly, i realize that I cant "choose" his friends forever, but I can give him some to choose from now that will hopefully stick around. Shew wee, this was not meant to be a parenting blog.... my whole, sweet point after all of that rambling is that after one of Carson's hard days, I was laying him down for bed. He always leans over to give me a kiss after he drinks his milk ( and we brush his teeth, of course :), and then he says to me, "Mommy I love you, I hope you sleep tight." I took that opportunity on this particular night to explain to Carson ( who had just accidentally poked me in the eye and apologized) that I love him even when he doesn't listen to me. My sweet boy looked at me in all sincerity and said, Mommy, I love you even when I poke you in the eye." What a much needed precious moment!

2010-05-03T14:24:00.000-07:00

This little boy is growing up too fast. Yesterday we stopped by his grandparents house and he asked me if I was coming in ( he asks this every time, because he always wants me to stay), I said, sure Mommy will hang out too today. He looked at me and said, "Mommy, you go do something else and come back and get me." Huh? I was kinda in shock because this was a first for this little three year old. I was a little excited because I realized that a) I had some things I could definitely get done, and b) this could not have begun to happen with him at a better time, than when I am almost 6 months pregnant..... and that was about as far as the reality went before my emotions said, "Hey, you mean you want me to leave ?!" I was a little sad, but overall I am pretty excited that Carson is beginning to be more secure without having to be attached to me, which had to happen at some point in his little life. I wouldn't want him crying for me when he walked into middle school or anything, but it was nice while it lasted. Before I go thinking he has completely forgotten about me, I must mention that today during lunch he said to me, "Mommy, lets dance and I will twirl you around like a princess." I guess I still have a special place in his heart after all :)

scared silly

2010-05-03T14:09:00.000-07:00

This is going to sound like I am rambling, because I am. I am most definitely hormonal right now, and that is probably not the best time to blog my heart out, but.... I am anyway. Last night it hit me that I am having a little girl. I mean, I have the crib the pink polka dot bedding, some cute pink clothes and shoes, but I don't think that the reality of that sank in until last night and it scared me. It really, really scared me. I have let my hormones take me on a roller coaster of fear about this sweet baby girl. I have been so spoiled by Carson, who is such a Mama's boy and thinks that I hung the moon ( though he is starting to outgrow that a little). I remember how much my mom and I fought when I was a teenager and how much she could drive me crazy and my daddy could do no wrong. Don't get me wrong, I really want Adam to have the experience of having a Daddy's girl, but the fear of relating to a daughter myself... especially right after having such a Mamas boy nearly shook me out of my sweet baby girl day dreams. I think I started to get a little nervous when a lady in a store told me that her friend has a little boy and a little girl, and there is still something special about that Mamas boy, even as he has aged. While I love the bond I have with Carson, it makes me wonder what type of relationship Charleston and I will have. I am so worried that she wont like me or that we will not like each other, which I am sure is bound to happen one day, but the reality of that all brings me to one point that I have figured I need to get out of all this. My job as a parent is not to be loved ( which will happen inevitably), but to love, nurture, discipline and train independent, Christ loving, selfless, well rounded adults. It is not about me. I don't know how many times I can learn that and in how many different ways, but apparently I still need to get hold of it.

I really wanted Charleston's middle name to be Moriah... after the mount where Abraham took Isaac to offer to the Lord. I am still going to beg Adam to let me put it on her birth certificate as a reminder to myself and my sweet, precious baby girl, that she and her brother are both offerings to the Lord, they are not for me to cling to or get my desire to be needed met, I will trust Him with my babies, because He can care for them so very much better than I ever could. I will trust Him daily, no matter how scared I am.

(just a little sewing I have been able to do for Charleston.. her first monogrammed burp cloth :))

he loves her....

2010-04-22T18:33:00.000-07:00

This little boy loves his little sister. I know, she is not here yet and it may all change once she starts taking up his mommy's lap and time. For now, just let me embrace the sweetness that he loves her! He constantly pulls up my shirt to hug and kiss her, he tells her he loves her and today he said, "Mommy lets pray for baby sister that she stays in until she is healthy." He loves to listen to her heartbeat and try to feel her kick. This big brother loves his babysister and I cant wait for them to meet for the first time. the picture on the top is of his mommy with Charleston in my belly and the second half of his artwork is babysister, with a bow in her hair. Not that I already have a stack of hairbows he has seen or anything :)

unworthy

2010-04-22T18:27:00.000-07:00

Charleston Makenzie

Our swet baby number two is officially a girl! We are so excited, but I think that I mostly feel so unworthy. It absolutely amazes me that the Lord sees fit to entrust me with two beautiful, amazing little people. Seriously, I cry easily at the thought of the hugh responsibility and how unworthy I feel. Don't get me wrong, I think I am a pretty good mom, I play with Carson, teach him,encourage him, and love him to pieces. Most days I am pretty good at this parenting thing ( so I think ), but there are those other days when Carson and I are both grouchy, my patience is thin, and don't accomplish nealry what I wanted.On those days, I don't play or teach him and Satan whispers lies and reminds me of my failures throughout the day. Its those days that I think, man.. my baby/babies deserve so much more. Instead of wallowing in it and feeling bummy I will reslove to surrender to Christ. I will teach my kids that we all have bad days, and that you pick yourself up and move along, knowing that my life has no value apart from Christ anyway.

There is still an amazing beauty about the blessings of babies. I think I feel a little selfish since I know so many people who want babies so badly and can't have them ( my mom was one of them). I wonder how come he chooses to give me these sweet babies and why not others... why the young teenager who is not capable and not the thirty something who is desperate for a baby to spoil? I don.t know that I will ever understand it, but I am so greatful and humbled at the opprotunity to raise another little gift from the Lord. I am also selfishly greatful that my mom couldn't have babies, because then she wouldnt have gotten me.... or, I wouldnt have gotten her :)

Treasures for my heart

2010-03-24T13:08:00.000-07:00

Spring is finally here, and I love this weather! I got to wear a summer dress today and when Carson saw me he said, "Mama, you look beautiful in that dress." I thanked him and he then looked at me hard and said, "Mama, can I marry you one day?" I told him that he could and he told me several times in the next five minutes how pretty I looked. I told him that he could pick any girl in the whole world to marry and he said he would pick me. I knew I needed to explain that I was married, but I was so flattered. He then said, "Mama, when I grow up, I am gonna marry you and then me and you and Daddy will all be married." He seemed pretty happy with that thought so I just left it at that and smiled inside and out. Thank you sweet baby boy for helping your mama feel beautiful today.

Carson and I walked to story time at the library this morning, he held the door open for me to get the stroller out, and told me that he is a gentleman. On the way home we picked a few flowers (weeds) and Carson said that he was saving those for his Daddy when he gets home tonight :). How sweet!

Mama Bear

2010-03-22T12:52:00.000-07:00

Funny that I just posted yesterday about the crazy things you will do for your kids. Today I took Carson to the McDonalds play area. The activity died down a little after lunch and there were only a few kids left, Carson being the youngest at 2. I noticed a bigger boy, about 5, push Carson and Carson was trying to push him back. I got up and fussed at Carson, telling him to tell me if someone pushes him and to keep his hand to himself. He asked me if that little boy was going to get in trouble too, and I told him that it was that little boys Mommys job to discipline him. Within 15 minutes Carson came to me crying and said the boy called him a dumb dumb and that he told that boy his name was CARSON! I wanted to set the kid straight, but more than that I wanted Carson to know somewhat how to handle things himself. I told Carson that if that boy called him a name again to tell the kid his name and that he is not a dumb dumb and to stay away from that little boy. Carson agreed and within 5 minutes of being back in the play place I heard the kid yell , "c'mon guys here comes dumb dumb", to which my sweet baby said, "I am not a dumb dumb, my name is Carson!" At this the other childs grandmother says to him that he should stop name calling or they would leave... which she had already threatened 3 times before and he was evidently well aware that the threat was empty. I called Carson down (my face had to be red and my eyes were filled with angry tears), I was ready to leave (my typical response to conflict).... and Carson came down singing, "my name is Carson, my name is Carson... and he said to me, "Mommy, I told that boy that my name is Carson and I sang my song to him. My sweet baby was responding better than I was! Carson wanted to slide one more time and I sat back and prayed that the Lord would give me wisdom, patience, and the ability to keep from giving that other child and his Grandma a piece of my mind. Carson slid again and was ready to go. We got in the car and I cried while I called Adam to tell him about the whole thing. We both told Carson how proud we were of him for doing the right thing. On the ride, he said to me, Mommy, I am not a dummy am I?" I said, "No, honey, in fact I think you are much smarter than that other little boy because you made a good choice to do the right thing." Carson sang his song again and told me that he thought the other little boy needed a spanking, to which I agreed and told him that if I ever heard him call another child an ugly name that he would get a pop and we really would leave.
I am just amazed at how quickly the anger rose up and how badly the childs comment hurt (me). My sweet baby handled it better than I did! Can I blame the pregnancy hormones for the tears? Maybe, or maybe it was just the mama bear in me!

Love You Forever

2010-03-22T06:42:00.000-07:00

Have you ever read that book? It is basically about a Mom who sings her little baby boy a lullaby, "I love you forever, Ill like you for always, as long as I'am living my baby you will be". She holds him and sings to him in the middle of the night, after he has gone to sleep. The catch is that she does this as he grows up, even when he is a grown man. Finally the little boy holds the Mom as she is dying and sings the song to her. The book ends with him singing the song to his new little baby. I can't get through reading the book to Carson with out crying everytime. You know those kind of tears that you just can't hold back. Not just one little tear, but the throat hurting kind. I must admit that its a little strange when the Mom drives across town to her grown sons house to hold him at night and sing to him while he is sleeping and unaware, but the feeling inside is there for me.. I can't imagine a day when Carson is not my baby, let alone my dying and leaving him. Yikes! For now, I sing the song to him and hold him as much as I can. I know that the new baby will change things and I wont be able to just sit and hold him as much as he lets me now. He still loves to rub my arm. The day that goes by without him rubbing my arm is certain to ilicit tears. I still love rocking him to sleep, yes I still rock him to sleep, well at nap time anyway. He went down by himself the other day just laying in his bed. I gave him a big prize and then cried because he is really growing up.I wish I could hold him forever. Instead of continuing this sob story, I should share some of the good things about his growing up...

He is super funny, and loves to make me laugh with his silly faces. He sometimes makes these faces at other people and I have to explain that he is being silly, and not rude.... of course :)

He is pretty much going to be the best big brother ever. He already loves HIS baby sister and can't wait to hold her. He talks to my belly and kisses it all of the time, even tries to do it in public.

He has pretty much mastered the alphabet, color,s shapes, numbers to 20 without help and farther if I help him transition at the tens.His memory is amazing. He is great at floor puzzles, even the hard ones. He is starting to understand board games but hasn't quite grasped how to be a "good sport" aka, not cry and have a fit when you loose. We recently played Candy Land with Daddy, who won the game. It just so happened that Carson sincerely beat me at the game all day and was totally bummed when he lost. We played again and I tried to "boost his spirits" by ahem, ~~encouraging good sportsmanship~~ rigging the deck, which my hubby set me straight on. I got a small taste of why moms do crazy, wrong things for their kids some times, I mean its Candy land for goodness sake and I was willing to cheat for him so that he wouldn't loose a board game! To Carson's surprise and apparently to mine, he will loose sometimes, and he will hurt and he may even cry but learning to cope with difficulties, great and small, is a great time for life lessons!

( I am saying all of this to myself of course)

He clearly still has me wrapped around his finger!

Well, maybe not every moment. For example the other day when he was in time out for crying over something silly ( I am really trying to encourage him to ask for help in a "big boy voice" rather than having a meltdown when he needs help, can't find a toy etc) and while he was sitting in the time out chair he informed me that he was going to , "throw this chair in the trash."